THE DISHMASTER

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July 2010

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Kim Cattrall Gets Honorary Fellowship — Who Knew Education Was This Easy?

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When I first heard about honorary degrees, I thought: how do I get one of those?  Apparently you can save years of your life by merely being a celebrity.  Had I just spent those four miserable years of undergrad pursuing fame and fortune instead, I could have just bought my “honorary degree” and avoided all the painful pot-head speeches about how marijuana actually makes you more productive.  Kim Cattrall received her honorary fellowship from Liverpool John Moores University.  In her speech, she congratulated the graduating class on “work[ing] damn hard.”  Perhaps she should have included the line, “if all of you focused on a job instead of studying, you could have the same degree–except you would be rich on top of it.”