If you click on the “about me” section to the right of this post, you’ll see my mission statement, in which I declare an end to internet bullying that I see elsewhere. Today’s culprit is Radar Online, who accused Lady Gaga of having a “muffin top and a belly roll.” The evidence for their disgusting claim is based on an unflattering photo of the singer in a slouched position. First of all, every woman on the planet knows that the crouched position is never flattering. Second, can the editor of Radar Online please pose in a speedo so that I can circle his own muffin top? I realize that Gaga invites this by wearing promiscuous clothing, but does the Radar editor hope to see a stick thin woman? Evidence suggests that men who favor stick-thin women are closet homosexuals. And if you’re wondering where I got that scientific data, it’s from TheDishmaster.edu. Look it up.