Dear ‘X Factor’ Judges — Stop Crying!

For those that know The Dishmaster, you’re aware that emotion makes me uncomfortable. So you can imagine my discomfort to discover that all the judges on ‘X Factor’ are crying hysterically after every performance. Do they lack any semblance of internal control? It’s awkward and unnecessary, and in the case of Nicole Scherzinger — it looks fake. Isn’t this technically a place of work? Are they really that moved? Am I just a heartless prick? Watch Leroy Bell sing ‘Angel’ below, and then wait until the end to see Scherzinger’s curious, unmovable face.

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