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I really want to believe that Artie Lange is sober. But I remember his days on Howard Stern when he consistently insisted he was sober, and he wasn’t. Unfortunately, we know how that sad story ended. So when I saw him on Conan O’Brien to promote his new radio show, I thought: “Please look good. Please convince me you’re okay.” Sadly, he looks awful. He told Conan that his heroine days are behind him, and he even joked about his addiction. I know that he’s a comedian, and I know that comedians make fun of their own lives. But his riff sounds all too familiar to the same bit he threw to Howard Stern. I have no idea whether he’s still using. I can only hope he has his act together. As for Howard Stern, Stern won’t allow him back on the show to tell his story because, according to Stern, he doesn’t “feel strong enough within [himself] or that [he’d] be doing the right thing by him, because [he doesn’t] want to do the wrong thing for Artie. [He] just want[s] Artie to stay alive.”