Kim Kardashian’s Playboy Pictures Surface — But Isn’t She “Shy?”

Naked pictures of Kim Kardashian’s 2007 Playboy photo-shoot have surfaced, and Kardashian is allegedly unhappy. She apparently wants to “put this behind her,” and is embarrassed she did the shoot in the first place. Gee, this sounds awfully familiar. I heard the same speech about her sex tape, which she also regrets, though she’s never publicly admitted she released it. When she discussed the tape, she said it was “humiliating” because she’s actually very “shy.” Here’s what I know about myself. You’d have to pummel me over the head with a heavy object to get me into a room for a naked photo shoot. And, unlike Kardashian, I wouldn’t even call myself “shy.” If you are going to promote yourself with sex and nudity, then own it. Don’t take a fully naked photo-shoot, and then release quotes about what a mistake it was. Take a look at Kardashian’s naked pictures, and let me know if you think she’s “shy.”

Regina King — Here’s How the In Memoriam Works

Regina King fired off an angry letter to the Huffington Post, with so many complaints in it my head started to hurt halfway through.  Many of them were race related, stemming from an Emmy photo mix-up where Regina King was mistaken for Rutina Wesley, even though they look nothing alike.  At the end of the letter she complained about her friend, Sesame Street actress Alaina Reed, being left out of the tribute, and asked who decides who is and isn’t in the tribute.  Well, Regina, I’ll tell you.  It’s completely discretionary, and it’s often a heartbreaking task for the person that decides.  He gets calls from family members, requesting that someone be featured, and he is also notified via a list from the Academy.  Because not everyone can feasibly be featured, he has to pick and choose as he sees fit, and then notify the family shortly before the telecast.  I know this not only because I know how to use Google, but also because my good friend’s uncle was featured in last years In Memoriam.  Here’s my advice: humor works better than anger.  In fact, Rutina Wesley did a very good job of addressing this on Wendy Williams.  Perhaps you should take note.  Watch below.

Lifetime Puts the Kibosh on Tim Gunn’s Video Blogs

Someone needs to tell the folks over at Lifetime what makes for good television — because they don’t get it.  In one of Tim Gunn’s infamous video blogs, he revealed that he “promised Lifetime” that he would stop referring to the judges as “crack smokers.”  First of all, Lifetime should be begging Tim Gunn to continue bashing the judges, because it not only creates the controversy that feeds ratings, but it’s authentic.  He isn’t trying to be titillating; he’s merely pointing out the obvious — that the judges are insane this season.  Tim Gunn is a reality television rock star because, as Gunn says, he’s a “truth teller.”  Plus, he’s also a nice guy — imagine that.   So my advice to Lifetime is to have a nice, long talk with your producers, because they are obviously missing something.  If you’d like to see a sample of Tim Gunn’s truth telling, watch the video below, where Gunn tells the truth about Vogue’s Anna Wintour.  Even Miranda Priestly wouldn’t do what Wintour did.

Welcome Back to The View — My Barbara Walters Tribute

Barbara Walters is back on The View, and no one is happier than me.  Growing up, I planned to be just like Babs.  I often find myself at Starbucks phrasing questions to my friends the way I think Barbara would, but for some reason I don’t get the same tearful disclosures that she does.  When I watch interviews today, I become infuriated at the horrible, judgmental interviewers (not to name names — but like Matt Lauer, for instance), and I yearn for the days when Walters interviewed everyone and their mother.  Lucky for me, I get my Barbara fill on The View, where she’s much like the Queen of England at a petting zoo.  She’s sadly been on hiatus due to heart surgery, and The View was noticeably different.  Ironically, her departure aged the show by about  thirty years, with the remaining hosts constantly discussing the gross effects of aging.  So welcome back Barbara.  It wasn’t the same without you.  Further Reading: When Did The View Become a Nursing Home?

Casey Affleck Says Joaquin Phoenix Documentary Not a Hoax — Is he Lying or Evil?

In the judgmental world of The Dishmaster, when you record someone’s demise for profit, you’re evil. So if it’s true that Casey Affleck legitimately chronicled Joaquin Phoenix’s unraveling for I’m Still Here, then I feel sorry for Phoenix, who was taken advantage of by his brother-in-law. Personally, I think it’s a hoax, and not a funny one. Joaquin’s own brother, River Phoenix, died of a drug overdose, and Phoenix himself went to rehab for alcohol addiction. I therefore think both Affleck and Phoenix are irresponsible assholes for making this movie. Affleck wanted a hit film to give him a career boost, and Phoenix went along with it, because Affleck is married to Phoenix’s sister, and he presumably wanted to help out his brother-in-law. What a coincidence that Phoenix cleaned his act up after Affleck’s film was done shooting.  Further Reading: Casey Affleck is Shopping Around a Joaquin Phoenix Documentary — It’s Apparently Disturbing.

John Cusack Proves that Celebrities Need to Get Off Twitter

Let me begin by admitting that I constantly write celebrities on twitter, and I love that I can contact them directly, instead of having to break down the concrete wall usually created by their “people.”  That being said, my advice is that celebrities either need to jump twitter-ship, or run their tweets by someone who can help them avoid exposing their true, ridiculous inner-selves.  John Cusack’s recent twitter mishap only solidifies this point.  When asked what he thinks of a ground-zero mosque, Cusack tweeted, :”I AM FOR A SATANIC DEATH CULT CENTER AT FOX NEWS HQ AND OUTSIDE THE OFFICES [OF] DICK ARMEY AND NEWT GINGRICH-and all the GOP WELFARE FREAKS.”  I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: I like my celebrities with an air of mystery, and if that means that they avoid political discussions, or showing their wrinkles on twitter, then so be it.  And because I don’t believe that either John Cusack or Fox News are qualified to discuss politics openly, they should both be quiet.  Further Reading: Teri Hatcher Posts Unflattering Pictures of Herself on Twitter — Is This Necessary?

Will Howard Stern Leave Sirius for an Adam Curry Podcast?

Howard Stern recently interviewed Adam Curry, a multi-millionaire also known as the “pod-father of radio.”  Stern asked him if it was possible to make money off of podcasting, and Curry offered him $100 million dollars on the spot to work for him.  I blew it off at the time, but I now think that Curry is among Stern’s “other offers” that he mentions during his on-air, angry negotiations with Sirius.  Today, he said that he will “find a way” to bring new technology to people’s cars, and if he has to leave Sirius he is sure his fans will follow him, regardless of the technology.  I think he was cryptically referring to Curry’s offer.  Here’s my advice for Stern — either return to terrestrial, stay with Sirius, or leave radio altogether.  When Stern left terrestrial radio, he severely cut his listening audience, because many of his loyal fans did not switch over to satellite radio.  If he again changed technology, he would cut his audience even further, and his voice would essentially become obsolete.  Sometimes it’s not about the money, it’s about your legacy, your brand, and sheer numbers.  $100 million dollars sure is a lot of money, but is it worth it? Further reading: Was Howard Stern’s Vacation Really a Contract Negotiation?

Musicians that Want to be Actors — Is it Possible?

Some actors have easily made the transition to music (i.e. Jennifer Lopez), but it seems much harder for musicians to make the transition to acting.  My theory?  Many actors got their start in musical theater, and can already sing, so the transition isn’t as difficult.  But what musician hung out in their high school’s drama club?  I can’t think of a faster way to loose your rock star status.  I’ve compiled a list of musicians that gave acting the old college try, but to no avail.

Mariah Carey has had the acting bug for quite some time. I first saw her on the big screen with a funny cameo in 1999’s The Bachelor, and she later starred in Glitter. She got her first positive accolades from her appearance in Precious, coupled with much speculation about whether her woman-mustache was real or fake. Fear not — it was fake.


Justin Timberlake has had a few substantial acting roles, but has yet to find his breakout hit. He first impressed me in a movie called Alpha Dog, where he proved he can definitely act. He’s just filmed Bad Teacher, with his ex-girlfriend, Cameron Diaz — who I assume recommended him for the role. It certainly pays to be on good terms with exes. Perhaps I should start making some bury-the-hatchet phone calls?

You might not know that Jon Bon Jovi tried to be an actor. After Robert Downey Jr. left Ally McBeal due to some highly publicized “issues,” Bon Jovi became her new love interest, in hopes of resurrecting the ratings. It didn’t work. Though he was certainly nice to look at, there just wasn’t any chemistry. He also appeared as Sarah Jessica Parker’s love interest on Sex and the City.  I actually think his best role was as an angry wife-beater in Pay it Forward, but the film never took off.

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Today’s Question: Is There Another Olsen Sister?

This news blew my mind.  All this time I thought I only had to be annoyed by the Full House twins, and now I discover that there’s actually a third sister in the business?  Who knew?   Elizabeth Olsen, the 21 year old younger sister of Mary Kate Olsen and Ashley Olsen, will be starring in the Indie film, Peace, Love & Misunderstanding, alongside Chace Crawford and Jane Fonda.  I suppose this news is so shocking because I’ve read many interviews with the Olsen twins (yes, I’m embarrassed to admit that), and at no point did either one of them mention a sister.  In fact, I often thought that the Olsen sisters were actually Siamese twins, given that they both give such similar answers in interviews.  And by “similar,” I mean an equal amount of nothing.  Alright, now I’m just being mean.  But seriously, another Olsen?!

Kate Winslet to Evan Rachel Wood: “Get Naked”


Evan Rachel Wood says that Kate Winslet convinced her that getting naked for her new film, Mildred Place, was the right thing to do, saying, “it’ll be great,” and “you’ll be happy you’ve done it.” I’m glad that Kate Winslet is putting her Oscar to good use by mentoring young woman on acting. If she keeps this up, perhaps she can get an entire theater class to take their clothes off. May I just say that I’ve never seen a movie with nudity that I didn’t find off-putting and distracting. That goes for men, as well as women. Jason Segel, for example, showed his penis in Forgetting Sarah Marshall, and I was traumatized. If you think I’m exaggerating, Netflix the film, and you’ll see what I mean. I was even put-off by Marissa Tomei’s nudity in The Wrestler, as I spent the rest of the film wondering how hard I would have to work out to have her body, and became extremely depressed when I realized it would be impossible. Needless to say, the film was ruined.