The Dishmaster

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eva longoria Archive

Sunday

3

November 2013

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COMMENTS

Tabloid Tell-All — The Weekend Edition

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  • N’Sync reunited for Chris Kirkpatrick’s wedding. E! Online
  • Vicki Gunvalson cried herself a river of hypocrisy. Wet Paint
  • Charlie Sheen hates Brooke Mueller . . . and DCFS. TMZ
  • Elizabeth Hurley and Shane Warne reconciled. Express
  • Eva Longoria has a new man. NYDN
  • Miley Cyrus’ tongue was not in Benji Madden’s mouth. EntertainmentWise
  • Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson will never learn. HuffPost
  • Kristen Cavallari and Jay Cutler are on their way to another baby. R29
  • Olivia Wilde and Jason Sudeikis are pregnant. Us Magazine
  • Adrienne Maloof has a new boy toy. DailyMail
  • That old guy and his teenage wife are splitting up. CDAN

Thursday

17

November 2011

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COMMENTS

Quote of the Day – Eva Longoria

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“I can’t walk in this f-cking dress! This is Victoria Beckham, and so you know, it’s a size negative four. I can’t breathe. I think the zipper is about to go swoosh!” The very funny Eva Longoria discussing the perils of fashion at an event honoring photographer Randall Slavin.

Friday

3

December 2010

0

COMMENTS

Erin Barry Denies Tony Parker Affair — Confirms She’s Annoying

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I almost vomited when I read Erin Barry’s statement about her alleged extra-marital affair with Eva Longoria’s husband, Tony Parker.  She spent most of the letter talking about how important she is, and how she is “way too busy” to fuck Tony Parker, or to worry about home-wrecker accusations.  At one point she even discusses how she likes to save little children in her spare time.  Oh yeah — and she’s in law school.  Wow — if throwing your law degree around actually excused morally depraved actions, I guess I could have a permanent get-out-of-jail-free card.  Couldn’t she just write two sentences about how she doesn’t like to screw married men and call it a day?  Did I mention that she blames the rumors on the fact that she and Parker are going through divorces at the same time, and not the fact that Eva Longoria exposed her name in the press.  Though I can’t confirm Longoria spilled the beans, I’m almost positive that’s how this information leaked.  Does Barry really think I’m going to believe her name was pulled out of thin air?  If it was merely about “getting divorced at the same time,” then I’m sure Tony Parker could be accused of screwing every single woman on the planet, because the divorce rate is around 60% now.  And by the way — please refrain from demeaning Eva Lonogoria’s feelings by going on and on about how this isn’t important to you.  If it were me, and this accusation was false, I might say something like, “I’m so sorry that Eva Longoria has to deal with this.  Divorce is hard enough without these false rumors on top of it.”