THE DISHMASTER

My favorite part of Jennifer Lopez’s performance at the Billboard Music Awards was watching Taylor Swifts jubilant dance along. Watch JLO show everyone how it’s really done.

Do you think that while Jennifer Lopez performed on American Idol she thought, “Hey Bitches, this is how it’s done?” She sure “Live[d] it up.” Watch the consummate diva break it down on Idol, and take special note of how she’s a bad-ass. Enjoy (it starts at the five minute mark).

If Halle Berry can pop one out at her age, why can’t Jennifer Lopez?

When asked if she’d like more children, she said that although it might not be in the cards, it would certainly be a blessing. Watch below.

Jennifer Lopez reigns supreme on my girl-crush list, and that’s a shocking revelation considering I bashed her in the early days. When rumors swirled that American Idol attempted to snag her mid-season in place of Mariah, I believed it immediately. The ratings are tanking, and the producers are desperate. Also — she was a popular addition whose absence has had a profound impact. Watch the curvy goddess address the rumors, and notice how she doesn’t deny it. Silence is compliance — at least in my world.

A new report from The Hollywood Reporter indicates that American Idol producers recently scrambled to oust Mariah Carey mid-season and replace her with the recently departed Jennifer Lopez. I find this particularly interesting, especially considering the real ratings threat comes from Nicki Minaj, but perhaps the producers feel the opposite. And since Mariah comes with a hefty cost, I suppose it makes sense to can her. That being said, she’d still have to be paid out for the remainder of the season, so cost-cutting can’t be the real motivation. Perhaps she is in fact a behind-the-scenes diva and they’re done with her? Given her recent comments about “the powers that be” over at FOX, it’s not a shocking theory. Whether it’s true or not, that show better act fast. Because star-power is clearly not what’s missing.

Not to piss on her burger party, but I’m convinced Heidi Klum is getting bad career advice. Though I support women looking sexy at all ages, this brand has a shelf life, and she’s pushing it past its prime. She needs to start her transition into a more sustainable public image, or she’ll be left by the wayside while younger, hotter chicks take her throne. Sure Jennifer Lopez has managed to pull it off, but Lopez has mastered the art of light and shade, and her brand extends beyond her hot-chick status. Perhaps I’m wrong. After all, The Dishmaster doesn’t know everything. Wait . . . who am I kidding/ I’m never wrong!

Watch the behind-the-scenes footage of her video below.

The story about Jennifer Lopez’s boyfriend being gay got me thinking: Is there go-to tabloid twists that they assign every A-lister? Since they seem like a perfectly happy couple, I suppose it’s not believable enough that either party is cheating — but wait! Casper Smart is a dancer! He must be gay, right? And if that doesn’t work, I predict the next story will be that Marc Anthony is begging Lopez to come back, and she’s in the middle of a love triangle and can’t decide who to choose.

When people ask me for my favorite celebrity style-icon, I always answer with Gwen Stefani. Though I love Jennifer Lopez, Stefani doesn’t just pick the right clothes, she styles it perfectly. As for what she was wearing on Good Morning America, it’s an OLIMA red frame top and Fendi pants — and calf-length Dr. Martin boots. It’s genius!

When I found out about Mariah Carey’s decision to join American Idol, I thought: “I’ll take the Mariah Carey from ten years ago, and not the Mariah Carey of today.” That’s not a dig at the current state of her career, it’s a dig at the current state of her public persona. In short — she’s almost become a caricature of herself, exuding a diva-like temperament in every interview. I miss the down-to-earth, flannel wearing Mariah Carey of the old days. To prove my point, I’ve posted a vintage interview with the superstar below. Here’s hoping she’s relatable enough to pull off this new role. After all, if Jennifer Lopez can turn her image around, so can Mariah Carey.

This is a hit I never saw coming. Steven Tyler officially announced that he’s leaving American Idol, saying, “I strayed from my first love, Aerosmith, and I’m back.” It’s rumored that Jennifer Lopez is on her way out also, which is mostly attributed to her recent career resurgence. I can’t help but wonder if his announcement is a fancy way of saying, “they didn’t ask me back,” but I’ll squash my internal cynic for a moment and make an even more cynical comment: His exit is completely irrelevant. His “everyone-is-wonderful” attitude didn’t add much to the show, and it only served to hurt his rock-star brand. So welcome back to the real world, Steven. We missed you over here.