THE DISHMASTER

Though I’ve heard from numerous inside sources in Hollywood that Lea Michelle isn’t exactly the “friendliest,” I generally try to give actors the benefit of the doubt. Perhaps my sources caught her in a bad mood or interacted with her at the end of an extremely long work day? But given Michele’s recent behavior toward Modern Family’s Sarah Hyland, I’m starting to believe these sources. When Highland hilariously made fun of Michele’s exaggerated red carpet poses for E!’s ‘Fashion Police,’ Michele refused to take the knock in stride, saying, “I gotta be honest. It hurt my feelings a little bit. I really think the message of today is that women should motivate and empower women . . . .” Call me insensitive, but I’m really sick of this “women should empower other women” line. First, it’s a jab disguised as the “high road.” Second, women will never empower other women. We are intrinsically catty, so no need to waste your breath on the vain hope for change. And lastly — when someone makes fun of you for something that you can control — it’s funny. Get a sense of humor and brush it off. Click the link below to watch the video in question.
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Has your poor behavior ever pissed someone off, yet their reaction is far worse than your original misstep? Such is the case with the consistently temperamental Ryan Murphy, the creator of Glee. Murphy isn’t pleased with his three key players, which includes Lea Michele, Chris Colfer, and Cory Montieth. In case you have not heard, Murphy announced to the press that Colfer, Michele, and Montieth would be “graduating,” thereby taking them off the show (or at least seriously reducing their services on the show). The press got wind, and said the actors had been “fired,” and Chris Colfer subsequently claimed to have found out about this news via twitter. Murphy wasn’t pleased about Chris’ claim, presumably because it made Murphy look like a heartless prick who talked to the press before notifying his actors. Predictably — Murphy is firing back — and I can only assume these actors are running for cover. According to Murphy, they knew all along, and he was even in talks to do a spin-off with them after Glee. They were therefore aware that they were leaving the show, and were not “fired via twitter.” As a result of their alleged misrepresentation, Murphy and the powers-that-be over at Fox have decided to punish them by nixing the spin-off. I have a few things to say about this. Ryan Murphy might need some anger management counseling. Second, Having said that, he’s still the creator of the show, which means it’s extremely disrespectful and stupid to publicly insult him. But why should Lea Michele and Cory Montieth be punished for what Chris Colfer said? They smartly kept their mouth shut. Should the entire class be punished for the actions of that one student who throws paper airplanes at the teacher?

There’s something suspicious about Ryan Murphy’s recent announcement that he’ll be letting go of his three choice players after Season 3 of Glee. First, all three actors are up for a contract renegotiation, and everyone knows that actors on a hit-show play hard-ball on Season 3 (remember Katherine Heigl’s Grey’s Anatomy debacle?). Second, they are three major stars, and despite Murphy’s proclamation that it’s the right creative choice, there is a huge risk of axing your primary series regulars. Does he seriously think that he can get three more unknown actors to duplicate the current lightning-in-a-bottle success of the show? All signs point to no. Third, what about Mark Salling? Why did he only announce that Lea, Cory, and Chris are leaving and neglect to mention Salling? Is it because Mark is less expensive, and Murphy knows he doesn’t require the same game of hardball? And lastly, the show barely tracked the years of its students, which means Murphy could easily stick to his real-time formula and keep these cast members on for two additional years (presuming they started as freshman). Instead, Murphy insists that “everyone knows they started as sophomores.” Really Mr. Murphy? I guess “everyone” doesn’t include The Dishmaster, because I was under the impression they all started as freshman, which gives them four years on the show — not three. His assumptions are certainly financially convenient — and suspicious.

Perhaps it’s because I’m feeling extra emotional lately, but Glee’s most recent episode pulled on my heartstrings. The show’s theme was Lady Gaga’s song, Born This Way, and the story began with Rachel Berry (Lea Michele) wanting a nose job. In real life, Lea Michele has been very vocal about her opposition to changing her nose, and I’ve called her my personal hero because of it. I figure us big-schnozed Jews have to stick together, and it certainly helps when one of those schnozes is famous. Watch a clip from the show below to see Lea Michele and Dianna Agron sing a mash-up of Pretty/Unpretty.

Alright. I’m going to take a moment to explain to the stars of Glee why it is inappropriate to pose on the covers of sex-based magazines in shirts with plunging necklines.  My problem is not that I’m prude (even though I am).  The issue is that Glee is meant to appeal to kids, and the actors need to uphold the brand.  I’d make the same argument if the star of a popular Kids comedy appeared as a guest star in Dexter.  It hurts the brand.  Sure, actors are real people with a career to maintain.  They want life after Glee, and they are starting the transition process early.  But it doesn’t matter.  While getting paid your hefty episodic fee, keep your clothes on, and think twice before you make appearances that contradict the character you portray on television.

Dianna Agron wrote a ridiculous apology on her blog, and it clearly proves that she still doesn’t understand the problem with the GQ photo-shoot. She apologizes and then says, “in the land of Madonna, Britney, Miley, ‘Gossip Girl,’ other public figures and shows that have pushed the envelope and challenged the levels of comfort in their viewers and fans… we are not the first.” I’m going to break this down for both Dianna, and for GQ Magazine, who defended their uncreative photographer by saying, “these ‘kids’ are in their twenties and should be able to “do what they want.” Here goes. The problem is not that Glee is a family show, and young children will be exposed to the magazine. The problem is that women in the entertainment industry are consistently sexualized by men, and yet they continue to pose nearly naked. Do you ever see Reese Witherspoon on the cover of a magazine in her underwear? She’s the only celebrity that has spoken out about her deliberate choice to keep her clothes on in photo-shoots. It isn’t necessary, and the next time the photographer comes up with the unoriginal idea, perhaps Lea Michele and Dianna Agron should stand up for themselves.

In response to the outrage over the Glee GQ cover, bad-boy Mark Salling said he thinks it’s “not a big deal,” because “people are starving,” and “there’s more important things to worry about in the world.”  Can celebrities stop making this argument when trying to circumvent tabloid criticism? I’m fully capable of focusing on world peace and a slutty GQ cover at the same time.  Isn’t it funny  how much information my pea-sized-brain can actually handle? How about I focus on those things and stop watching Glee altogether (since that other stuff is so much more important)?  The cover was gross and unnecessary.  Accept responsibility and move on.

What do you do when your show is successful? Take pictures of the female cast members in their underwear, of course.  Dianna Agron and Lea Michele took some very racy pictures for GQ Magazine, presumably because the photographer is an unoriginal pervert who could only think of taking sexual photos.  I’m curious how the conversation went.  Here’s what I imagine: “Hey Lea and Dianna, you know what would be really great?  If you just stripped down to your underwear and posed with a come-fu*k-me face.”  This isn’t the first time Lea Michele has posed in her underwear, so I’m guessing she’s comfortable with it.  For the life of me I’ll never understand why actresses feel the need to sexualize themselves in the entertainment industry.  Reese Witherspoon might be the only celebrity that refuses to do it, and I’m sure she’s endlessly propositioned.  By the way, isn’t Glee a family show?  To see the pictures in question, click the link below.

GLEE LADIES IN THEIR UNDERWEAR 

I am on the fence about whether to post this. Is pointing out someone’s dramatic weight loss the same as pointing out their dramatic weight gain? I don’t have an answer — so here goes nothing. While looking at pictures of Lea Michele from the Teen Choice Awards, I noticed her alarming weight loss. I saw her first season of Glee, where she looked healthy, as if she actually ate food. Now, she’s almost unrecognizable. If you have read my previous posts, you know that I favor the curvy girls in the industry. That’s either because of my own “curves,” or because I have a lot of male friends, who always tell me that they don’t like super-skinny chicks, as they have no interest in “fu*king little boys.” When deciding whether to post about this, I asked myself what my mother would say, and I envisioned Lea Michele walking into my home, at which point my Jewish mother would immediately make her a home-cooked meal and say “you’re getting too thin!” If my mother would do it, I think it’s okay. To see a before picture of Lea Michele, look below.

Update: It occurred to me why Lea Michele dropped so much weight for the new season of Glee. She was told that she had to perform Britney Spears’ hit song (in a sports bra), Baby One More Time, and she freaked out and dropped a ton of weight. Not good. Watch the Britney trailer here.

With the exception of a few performances, I didn’t really like this year’s Tony Awards.  It felt a bit stale, and only ‘American Idiot’ gave me the desire to fly to New York and see a Broadway show.  Matthew Morrison and Lea Michele easily stole the show for me, and used their stage chops to show that they sound just as good live as they do on ‘Glee.’  As an aside, I refuse to believe that Matthew Morrison is straight.  I realize he was engaged to a woman, and claims to be a heterosexual, but I’d like to believe that the reason I can’t have him all to myself is because he just doesn’t like women in general.  That has to be the reason right?  Watch the performance below.