Category: General

Maroon 5’s ‘Overexposed’ Music Review — It’s Good

I’ve never claimed to be a music critic, even though The Dishmaster is heavily centered on music. My very basic reviews are exclusively based on whether I’d like to listen to an album while driving down the Pacific Coast Highway on a beautiful Los Angeles day. So when I read the extremely intricate (and sometimes hilarious) assaults on Maroon 5’s new album, ‘Overexposed,’ I just assumed I’d hate the record. “How could so many critics be wrong,” I thought. And given my hatred for Adam Levine’s egotism, I also assumed I’d find pleasure in disliking his record. But I loved it. It is genuine and enjoyable, and the tracks are just the right mix of workout-out-worthy up-tempo and imagine-a-man-is-singing-this-to-me low-tempo. Listen below to “Sad.”

The Dishmaster Returns! — Tabloid Recap

I’ve returned from a very relaxing vacation, which involved some much-needed bonding time with some very good friends. Thanks to all my loyal readers for sticking around, and thanks to my mother for making me lots of delicious bagels for breakfast every morning. And in case you didn’t keep up with the celebrity gossip while I was gone, I’ve listed all the extremely important news items below. Enjoy!

 

  • Sienna Miller gave birth. Pop Sugar
  • Claire Danes is pregnant with her first baby. Us Magazine
  • Kris Humphries might have a pregnant ex-girlfriend. TMZ
  • Tom Cruise & Katie Holmes are negotiating a divorce settlement. E! Online
  • Kimberly Stewart showed-off her baby with Benicio Del Toro. Radar Online
  • Katy Perry reveals the reasons for her divorce from Russell Brand in her new film, ‘Part of Me.’ Hollywood Life
  • Ryan Reynolds & Blake Lively look happy. People
  • Singer Lily Allen is pregnant. Perez Hilton
  • Barney Frank married his longtime partner. New York Times
  • ‘The Office’s’ Ellie Kemper got married. New York Daily News
  • Serena Williams won her fifth Wimbleton title. Yahoo! Sports
  • George Clooney & Jennifer Aniston are still friends. Jezebel
  • Kelly Osbourne might be a brat. MSN
  • Jennifer Lopez is hot. The Superficial
  • Justin Bieber is a bad driver. Pop Crunch
  • ‘Magic Mike’ costars Channing Tatum & Alex Pettyfer hate each other. Celebitchy
  • ‘True Blood’s’ Joe Manganiello has a new girlfriend. Celebrity Pop
  • Spoiler Alert: Who does Emily Maynard pick on ‘The Bachelorette’? Astrochicks
  • Taylor Swift might be dating Patrick Schwarzenegger. Boston

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

‘Magic Mike’ — Movie Review

The best part of this film is Matthew McConaughey’s hilarious strip-club-hosting antics, and the second best part is Channing Tatum’s ass. Other than that, it’s just a plot-less guilty pleasure. The film follows “Magic Mike,” a guy with a dream to start his own business building custom furniture, who strips on the side to raise the money. He meets Adam (Alex Pettyfer) during a random construction job, and he convinces the troubled, aimless kid to join him later at his strip club. Strip club owner Dallas (Matthew McConaughey) thinks Adam’s “got something” and he hires him to strip. When Adam gets into trouble, his sister Brooke (Cody Horn) blames Mike, and Mike’s crush on Brooke leads him to a painful monologue about how he’s “more than Magic Mike.” There were many moments of this film when I found myself turning to my friend to ask, “When will they get back to the stripping?” and “Where is Matthew McConaughey?” I actually felt bad for Channing Tatum, whose acting skills were severely put to the test given that he had absolutely no foil to work with. In fact, the aforementioned “painful monologue” felt like a Channing Tatum’s screen-test, because Cody Horn looked as if she was too tired to actually act. Perhaps she was holding script pages instead of listening? As for Alex Pettyfer, he too could use some acting lessons. To be fair, it’s possible that the director (who I was shocked to discover is Steven Soderbergh) told his actors to “play it boring.” But the most disappointing element of the film wasn’t the actors, it was the limited amount of choreographed dancing. If you’re going cheap on the plot, then you better amp up the dancing. And three sequences is just not enough. That being said, get some popcorn and go see it. It’s not every day you see A-listers wearing next-to-nothing.

OVERALL RATING: 2 DISHES

‘Ted’ — Movie Review

Written by: Dan O’Connell, Guest Contributor

Hilarious extended riff on the wish-fulfillment storyline, a blue collar Boston guy (Mark Wahlberg) tries to balance his relationship with his extremely patient fiancee (Mila Kunis), and his stuffed bear Ted (voice of Seth MacFarlane), who came to life when he was eight after a Christmas wish. Now, Ted has turned into the equivalent of a former child star, getting high and sleeping around with hookers, and attempting to make it on his own with a crummy minimum wage job.

MacFarlane gets a lot of flak for running the pop culture references on “Family Guy” into the ground, as well as overly relying on non-sequiturs, but the guy knows how to keep a 90 minute feature afloat, and he keeps the laughs coming consistently. As for Wahlberg, he proves once again after his great comedic turn in “The Other Guys” that he knows how to play the straight man. Though the film ladles on the schmaltz a little too much toward the end, it’s a consistent laugh from beginning to end.

OVERALL RATING: 4 DISHES

The Amazing Spider-man — Movie Review

Written by: Dan O’Connell, Guest Contributor

Let’s party like it’s 2002: Wimpy high-schooler Peter Parker (Andrew Garfield), is bitten by a radioactive spider, giving him the ability to sling webs and fly about the city, but putting his burgeoning relationship with Gwen Stacy (Emma Stone) at risk, while battling Gwen’s police chief dad (Denis Leary) and the nefarious Dr. Curt Connors (Rhys Ifans), who has the ability to morph into a giant lizard and release clouds of noxious gas over NYC.

Many said this “reboot” came along too soon, only 10 years after Sam Raimi’s original, and I’m among them. Too much focus is put on the relationship between Pete and Gwen, and the movie spends much too much time setting up Spidey’s origin and doesn’t introduce the bad guy until over an hour into the film. There’s nothing here that wasn’t done better before. Every story element is almost exactly the same, and – although I never thought I’d see myself writing this – Tobey Maguire’s goofiness easily trumps Garfield’s introspective angst. The effects are solid, the 3D is well employed, and as a whole it isn’t bad, but it’s unnecessary, and smacks more of a cash grab than a legitimate attempt to revitalize a floundering franchise.

Overall Rating: 2.5 Dishes

The Dishmaster’s Vacation — Happy July 4th!

In celebration of July 4th, I’ll be on a blogging vacation. Please take this opportunity to do everything you’ll regret and report it back to me so I can gossip about it at a later date. Translation? — Do everything I wouldn’t do. As always, thanks to all of my loyal readers for sticking around, and for pestering me about my recent lack of posts. See you next Monday.

Anderson Cooper is Gay — One Day We Won’t Care

I’m happy Anderson Cooper publicly came out of the closet, but I’m sad that the declaration is still necessary. If straight people don’t have to announce their sexuality, then neither should gay people. I’m also sad that my Anderson Cooper sex fantasy will never be executed, but that’s not really relevant, is it?

‘Weeds’ Season 8 Premieres — Are Sociopaths Funny?

No one likes dark humor more than The Dishmaster, but last night’s premiere of ‘Weeds’ crossed the line. Season 8 began with Nancy Botwin being shot in the head, and the entire episode revolved around her family’s antics during her hospital stay. Those antics included her brother-in-law having sex in her hospital room, and both her sons showing zero sign of emotion over the possibility of their mother’s death. The show always rode the line between disturbing & intriguing, but when did it become a story about sociopathic criminals? I’ve had it.

Hilary Duff Fights Weight Criticism & Defends Yummy Body

If you know The Dishmaster, then you know I have a very select amount of girl crushes. And Hilary Duff has been on the list for years. She’s curvy and beautiful, and when the paparazzi snapped some post-baby pics of her body, my girl-crush affection increased drastically. Given that revelation, you can imagine my shock to discover the public attacked her weight, at which point Hilary Duff rightfully responded with, “Say it to me face,” and, “The weight doesn’t fall off overnight.” It’s absolutely astounding how horrible people can be, and considering that most of the country is obese, my guess is that her online critics are probably not in a position to criticize. And furthermore, Hilary Duff is one hot mamma.

Tabloid Gossip News Review — Celebrity Madness


 

 

  • Family Guy’s Seth MacFarlane dated Ryan Phillipe’s baby mamma. The Superficial
  • Jennifer Hudson temporarily called off her wedding. Perez Hilton
  • ‘True Blood’s’ Anna Paquin is pregnant with twins. Los Angeles Times
  • Johnny Depp might be dating Amber Heard. NYDN
  • Christie Brinkley & her ex-husband will never speak again. Radar Online
  • Jason Lee had a baby boy. TV Guide
  • Jessica Simpson has a cute baby. People
  • Megan Fox debuted her baby bump. Socialite Life
  • Chad Lowe has a second baby on the way. Wonderwall
  • John Edwards & Rielle Hunter broke up. ABC News
  • The Tom Cruise/Katie Holmes divorce mystery continues. TMZ
  • Adele is pregnant. Rolling Stone
  • Anderson Cooper is gay. CNN