THE DISHMASTER

My mother always told me that couples who constantly publicize their love are doomed to fail. I didn’t understand it when I was younger, but I get it now. If you feel the need to scream about your love from a rooftop — you probably feel as if you have something to prove. And the problem is — you’ll never prove it. That was the case with Billy Bob Thornton and Angelina Jolie, who always used public forums to declare their affection. Jolie once vaguely said in an interview that when you’re with someone that needs something like that, you do it because you love them. It’s now become clear what she meant. In a recent interview, Thornton confessed that he blew the marriage because he felt he didn’t deserve her. Watch below.
Continue Reading

Brad Womack was very close to staying classy while discussing his ex, Emily Maynard. When asked about Emily during an interview to promote the opening of his new bar, he called her, “One hell of a woman,” and then followed that up with, “I dodged a bullet with that relationship.” I’m not sure what that means — but my male-bulls*t-calculator thinks that it means he was constantly miserable, and he’s glad it’s over. Emily responded to his comment on Twitter, saying, “I’m sure they accidentally cut off the part where he said it was a diamond encrusted bullet.” At least someone can stay classy. Good work, Emily.

I’m not sure when Grey’s Anatomy became Lost, or how Shonda Rimes could dream up another catastrophe, but she’s done it again. As if a bomb in the hospital wasn’t enough? Watch the first seven minutes of tonight’s show below. Apparently one person dies — and if I had to place a bet — I’d put my money on Lexie. But that’s just me.

I can’t get enough of these girls. They are just so hilarious. Watch them discuss their experience at a Nicki Minaj concert.

Though I try to avoid throwing daggers at celebrities, I’ll make an exception for John Legend — who deserves it. When asked for his thoughts on Britney Spears and Demi Lovato judging X Factor, Legend said, “It’s interesting when people are judging singing competitions when they aren’t really singers.” Here’s my message to John Legend — at least Britney is interesting to watch. I’ve seen Legend in concert, and I missed most of the show because his music put me to sleep.
Continue Reading

Everyone knows that when you’re not fully over a boy, you still hope that no matter how many phone calls and text messages you ignore, he’ll show up at your door holding a stereo over his head while blasting Peter Gabriel music. But they just don’t make Lloyd Dobler the way they used to. So when I read Emily Maynard’s recap of The Bachelorette and realized that she thought it might be Brad Womack in the helicopter, it occurred to me that she’s not fully over him. Sure she said she was “relieved” when she saw it wasn’t him — but us chicks will say anything to convince the world of our own denial.

Pearl Jam’s ‘Just Breathe’ is one of my favorite songs in history, and since I’m also a huge Willie Nelson fan, I was elated to discover Nelson’s cover of the song. He sang it with his son Lukas for Willie’s SiriusXM channel, ‘Roadhouse.’ It’s interesting to hear the difference between Nelson’s upbeat tone and Vedder’s naturally fatalistic one. Listen below.

Carrie Underwood is a star. I mention this because it still surprises me that she shot to fame from ‘American Idol,’ and every time I see her perform — I’m reminded of what ‘The Voice’ isn’t. She’s classy, she has a great voice, and she’s gorgeous. Watch her form :Good Girl” on ‘Dancing With the Stars.’

Maria Menounos has had the same boyfriend for almost a decade, and he’s an extremely non-jealous man who doesn’t mind his girlfriend being sexually and emotionally propositioned on stage by Derek Hough. Not sure what I mean? Watch Maria and Derek perform the Argentine Tango, and take a close look at the end of the dance where he basically attempts to make out with her followed by caressing her face. They sure are good actors.

When Adam Carolla offered Arsenio Hall his podcast “crew” to help film Magic Johnson for a spot promoting The Magic Johnson Foundation, I couldn’t have anticipated the hilarious result. Apparently, Adam’s “crew” is really a group of intellectually stunted individuals who think “camera left” means “turn Magic Johnson to the left.” Watch below and be prepared to laugh very hard.