The Dishmaster

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March 2011

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Roger Ebert Annihilates ‘Battle: Los Angeles’ — Filmmakers Run for Cover

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I have to give Roger Ebert some unneeded credit from The Dishmaster.  He’s so brilliant, I often pinch myself about having lived with him in the same era.  In his Battle: Los Angeles review, Ebert basically tore the film to shreds, calling it, “noisy, violent, ugly, and stupid.”  He also asked whether they give “razzies for special effects,” saying that “the lazy editing style assumes nothing need make any sense visually.”  As an example, Ebert said, “From time to time, there’ll be a closeup of Aaron Eckhart screaming something . . . and on either side of that shot, there will be unrelated shots of incomprehensible action.”  To put the nail in the coffin, Ebert closed his review by citing the “Generations of filmmakers [who] devoted their lives to perfecting techniques that a director like Jonathan Liebesman is either ignorant of, or indifferent to. Yet he is given millions of dollars to produce this assault on the attention span of a generation.”  If you’re familiar with Roger Ebert, then you know that you might want to stay out of his way when he hates your movie.  Just ask Rob Schneider and Kick-Ass.  To read a list of the best quotes from Ebert’s review, Movieline laid it out quite nicely.

  • Mongoose

    Brilliant? Ebert may be brilliant (I will respectfully defer to the Dishmaster and say that he probably) but, in this instance I don’t think he needed any credit. It did not take a brilliant mind to watch the trailer and KNOW, beyond any and all doubt, that this film would crapfest. You watch the trailer and you know, yes this movie is going to mindless, shoddily put together, and have an IQ dropping storyline. But some of us say, hey I want to see a terrible film with lots of action, explosion, aliens, and LA destroying on the big screen. I may see it. This time, Ebert has told the world nothing it didn’t already know.

    • The brilliance isn’t that he can spot a crappy movie, it’s in his writing.
      Any asshole can point a finger and say “that sucks,” but it takes a true
      writer to explain exactly why it sucks in an extremely cutting way.