If you find yourself sending messages to your ex — either through his friends or on national television — then you’re not over him. Such was the case with Taylor Swift, who sent a very public message to her ex-boyfriend, One Direction’s Harry Styles, whose voice she’s alleged to have imitated with a British accent during her Grammy opening. We’ve all dated our fair share of losers, but Swift has cornered the unique market of converting her private life into a public story. And she does it intentionally. Personally, I think it lacks class. Most songwriters have vague ideas of their song’s aim, but it’s as if Swift’s entire intention is not to heal, but rather, as John Mayer says, to “rub [her] hands together and go, ‘Wait till he gets a load of this!'”