The Dishmaster

Paramount sent these over, and the artwork is so beautiful I had to share it. The film opens November 21st.

“The 122-pound, roughly five-and-a-half-foot-tall person in the driver’s seat of this enormous Range Rover is a child – a self-assured one, who may be used to the sound of screaming fans in the bleachers, but still a child, who, as he should, lives in his own circumscribed world, uninterested in anyone’s fantasies except for his own. “Yo, sorry for being late,” he says. “Traffic.” He yawns. “It’s so early. People are going to work, I guess. Like, work? What’s that?” An excerpt of Justin Bieber’s Rolling Stone interview, which revealed the writer’s (Vanessa Grigoriadis) likely distaste for the pop-star.

If you’re going to use fancy technology to make your voice nearly unrecognizable, and it still sounds like shit, then perhaps you should just lip-sync to someone else’s voice and pass it off as your own? It might be immoral, but by the time anyone figured it out you could pocket lots of cash, right? Listen to the very unenjoyable train-wreck below.

There’s no bigger misogynist than The Dishmaster, but even I have my limits. In a recent interview with The New York Post, Carolla revealed his gender bias (which is a kind way of putting it), saying:

“They make you hire a certain number of chicks, and they’re always the least funny on the writing staff. The reason why you know more funny dudes than funny chicks is that dudes are funnier than chicks. If my daughter has a mediocre sense of humor, I’m just gonna tell her, “Be a staff writer for a sitcom. Because they’ll have to hire you, they can’t really fire you, and you don’t have to produce that much. It’ll be awesome.”

This isn’t the first time Carolla has taken aim at women. If you listen to his podcast, it’s clear the man has some serious mommy issues. Perhaps Tina Fey and Kristen Wiig can give him a call.

Sometimes honesty is refreshing. Sharon Osbourne could barely speak through her tears while discussing her son’s Multiple Sclerosis diagnosis on ‘The Talk’ today, and I appreciated her emotional candor. Though it’s great to tell the public that you have to “be positive,” it’s also nice to admit the struggle. Watch below.

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In the end, aren’t we all strippers who whore ourselves out for money while we pursue our real-life passion on the side? Watch the trailer for ‘Magic Mike’ below.

Hollywood A-listers often complain about how hard it is to find a woman that doesn’t also yearn for the spotlight. So I can only imagine the reaction when such A-listers learned about VH1’s ‘Hollywood Exes,’ the new series that follows the lives of some very famous ex-wives. Is nothing sacred anymore? How much settlement money did they blow through to warrant this poor decision?

“Women shouldn’t insult other women” has become the new stock-phrase-defense to all criticism, and it’s replaced, “I’ll pray for you.” In response to Shonda Rimes’ twitter-attack of Amy Sherman-Palladino’s new show, ‘Bunheads,’ Sherman-Palladino turned the conversation to a meta-talk about women-on-women criticism instead of simply answering Rimes’ point. To be fair, the host for Media Mayhem did more talking than asking, and inappropriately lead the witness. Watch below.