Kim Kardashian certainly has her fair share of scorned lovers. First Nick Cannon admitted to Howard Stern that Kardashian lied to him about her sex tape, and now Nick Lachey revealed that Kardashian tipped off the paparazzi on their movie date. And let’s not forget the indefatigable HUMP that won’t go away. These revelations beg an important question: Has her fame train crashed?
Tag: Kim Kardashian
Ford Ad Pulled — Is the Paris Hilton/Kardashian Cartoon Offensive?
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Some approval processes go awry, and Ford learned that the hard way when their outside Ad agency published their unapproved work-product on the internet, which has subsequently created online outrage and lead to a profuse apology on behalf of the car company. So now that I’ve got that summary out of the way — allow me to have a laugh at what can only be called brilliant. Humor isn’t always appropriate, but it can be on-trend. And since everyone assumes Paris Hilton hates Kim Kardashian for basically hijacking her entire brand, it’s only fitting that she’d fantasize about taking them out for a joy-ride in her trunk. Seriously though — violence is never funny. Never.
The Kardashian Ratings Tank — Is the Brand Damaged?
For years I’ve defended the Kardashians. Sure they don’t have discernible entertainment-related talent, given that they don’t sing, dance, act, host, or do stand-up comedy. But they’ve managed to market themselves to mainstream media on the heels of one pornographic sex tape, which has since been parlayed into clothing stores, fashion lines, fragrances, and a well-paid television show. And that takes talent. In fact, I’d argue that the OJ Simpson trial, coupled with Bruce Jenner’s already existing media-name, is where it all began. With all the effort that went into building their empire, you’d think that the Kardashian Klan would be a little more careful about the brand that made them famous. Unfortunately, their actions as of late suggest otherwise, and their recent ratings-dip prove my point.
Kim Kardashian, arguably the most notorious sibling, has insisted that she’d like to step away from her sex-tape image, yet she continues to publish sexed-up photos on nearly every social media site (see duck face). And though I was willing to let that slide, my disdain boiled over when the sister’s smelled each other’s private parts on ‘Kourtney & Kim Take Miami.’ When I saw the episode, I was most disappointed in E!, a network with desensitized executives who neglected to pull the plug on a bit that wouldn’t even pass Howard Stern’s smell test. And let’s not forget Kim’s vampire facial, which warrants a lot of words — but I’ll remove my profane-laced tirade and merely call it classless. As for the 72-day marriage, I won’t kick the girl while she’s down, but she made the choice to air every facet of her private life on national television, including walking around town in history’s most gaudy engagement ring, which made me fear for her life.
Kim’s pregnancy was a perfect opportunity to transition the Kardashian brand into something more mature, because all sex-pots have a shelf-life, and she’s approaching her expiration date. Instead, she’s struggling with maternity fashion, and insisting on wearing heels despite her ever-growing bump. I understand she wants to look good, but when you have your own fashion line — it’s best to be on-trend, and baby-bumps don’t go with heels. To be fair, I’ve heard through the Hollywood grape-vine that Kim Kardashian is incredibly kind and professional, and everyone loves to work with her. And in the land of The Dishmaster, that goes a long way. That being said, I will hold you accountable for your poor choices, and they’ve made some.
Tabloid Takedown — Week-in-Review — Celebrity Rundown
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- Is Sofia Vergara is having a baby via surrogate? RumorFix
- Jake Gyllenhaal has a new girlfriend. E! Online
- Holly Madison won the worst-baby-name award. Us Weekly
- Elle Macpherson got engaged. Huffington Post
- Kim Kardashian is still paying for her bad taste in men. Wet Paint
- Sarah Jessica Parker finally talked about The Carrie Diaries. Just Jared
- Danny Boyle and Rosario Dawson split. Telegraph
- Pregnant Lady Antebellum’s Hillary Scott revealed her baby’s sex. Hollywood Life
- Marc Anthony’s May/December romance is heating up. Stuff
- It appears David Bowie and Mick Jagger really did have sex. Digital Spy
- Jessica Simpson dropped her baby’s gender. Zap2It
Quote of the Day — Kim Kardashian Likes Privacy
“My boyfriend has taught me a lot about privacy. I’m ready to be a little less open about some things, like my relationships. I’m realizing everyone doesn’t need to know everything. I’m shifting my priorities.” Kim Kardashian, on her desire for privacy (a statement made shortly before her newly released cover photo for L’Officiel Hommes magazine).
Tabloid Rundown — Week-in-Review
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- Diane Lane filed for divorce from Josh Brolin. SheKnows
- Mario Lopez’s has baby #2 on the way. Us Magazine
- Is Scarlett Johansson engaged? Us Magazine
- Melissa Gilbert is engaged and in love. Radar Online
- Erin Andrews doesn’t want to kiss 50 Cent. Inquistr
- Tiger Woods & Elin Nordegren are friendly exes. LA Times
- Taylor Armstrong debuted her new boyfriend. Starcasm
- Kim Kardashian & Kanye West are expecting a girl. MTV
- Chelsie Hightower got axed from Dancing with the stars. NY Daily News
- Zooey Deschanel has a new boyfriend. Just Jared
- Simon Cowell is no longer dating Carmen Electra. Huffington Post
- Kristen Stewart & Robert Pattinson might be broken up . . . again. The Stir
- Elton John is getting married. Wet Paint
- Winnie Cooper is officially divorced. Contact Music
- Katie Price (A.K.A. the British Pamela Anderson) is pregnant. Daily Mail
- Fergie is pregnant. People
- Kelly Clarkson and Clive Davis are dueling divas. Rolling Stone
Quote of the Day — Kim Kardashian’s Healthy Pregnancy
“I used to always say I can’t wait to get pregnant because I will just eat whatever I want, but it’s completely different. . . . I’m like, OK, I want to eat as healthy as possible. Though lately I’ve been watching shows like I’m Pregnant and Addicted to Meth. It definitely makes me feel better if I’m wanting one sip of Diet Coke or, you know, too much sugar. I’m like, This woman is on meth.” Kim Kardashian’s hilarious quote to DuJour Magazine about assuaging her overeating guilt while pregnant.
Tabloid Gossip — Weekly News Rundown
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- Maya Rudolph & Paul Thomas Anderson are expecting baby #4. CDAN
- The Robert Kardashian/Rita Ora drama is now public. Wonderwall
- Survivor winners Jenna Morasca & Ethan Zohn ended their 10 year relationship. C.Blend
- Hugh Grant is a dad again. The Wrap
- Kris Humphries will tank his career to sink Kim Kardashian. WetPaint
- Adrienne Maloof is leaving Real Housewives. LAist
- Rihanna is fashionably challenged. People
- Fergie is pregnant. Rumor Fix
- John Legend’s fiance is getting impatient. Contact Music
- Kate Bosworth is planning a summer wedding. Life & Style
- Alec Baldwin is having a baby. Hollywood Reporter
Kim Kardashian Wins in Court — Divorce Trial Set for May
Hell hath no fury like a little boy scorned. Despite Kris Humphries adamant attempts at delaying his Kim Kardashian divorce trial, the court pounced on the emotional pipsqueak today, claiming he’s had enough time to prepare and setting the trial for May. Humphries has feverishly pushed for an annulment based on fraud, and Kardashian has continuously pushed back, claiming there’s no evidence, and insisting she married for love, not ratings.
There’s a lesson to be learned here, folks. If a man is willing to marry on television, his intentions are likely not pure. And if a woman is willing to marry on television, her intentions are likely not pure. In summary, two tainted television whores do not belong tying the knot.
One-Minute-Rundown: Celebrity News of the Week
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- Cameron Diaz has a new man. Showbiz Spy
- Kim Kardashian didn’t offer Kris Humphries a $10 million, after all. Gossip Cop
- Shakira revealed her first baby picture. Inquisitr
- The ‘Teen Mom‘ drama continues. Digital Spy
- Michael Buble is expecting a baby. The Sun
- Rachael Ray’s husband may like swinger’s clubs. CrazyDaysAndNights
- Sylvester Stallone paid off his half-sister after allegations of abuse. Radar Online
- Jessica Simpsons’ parents are at war over divorce money. Reality Weekends
- Bethenny Frankel’s divorce is an official war. USA Today
- Tiger Woods is dating Olympic skier Lindsey Vonn. Huffington Post
- Lindsay Lohan fired her lawyer, and then unsuccessfully attempted to re-hire her. The NY Daily News