Lindsay Lohan’s Life Coach Quits — OWN

We are all intrinsic voyeurs, and while there’s a large part of us that wants to see people fail, there’s also a large part of us that wants to see people succeed. My guess is that Oprah has the latter affliction. She employed Lindsay Lohan for a “docu-series” shortly after Lindsay exited rehab, and though her intentions were pure, this was a poor decision all around. First, Lindsay should have lead a low-key life as she transitioned back to normalcy and sobriety. Second, the show has only served to prove all of Lindsay’s character failings. She yells at her staff, she cancels shoots at the expense of production, she lies on camera, and lastly, she throws temperamental fits like a spoiled child with stunted development. Her entire entourage enables her antics, and I’m guessing she’ll spend herself into bankruptcy pretty soon. Make no mistake. I know she’s an addict, and many addicts will relapse for years before finally staying sober. But given that Lindsay Lohan is spending the weekend at Coachella, my uneducated guess is that she’s not on the road to a successful turnaround. Sorry, Oprah. Watch a clip below.

Celebrity Instagram Pics — The Week’s Top Snaps

If you know The Dishmaster, then you know I have a strict policy against publishing paparazzi pictures. I will; however, publish pictures posted by the celebrities themselves, and you can often find some gems on instagram. I’ve posted this week’s top snaps below. Enjoy!

Photo courtesy of Casper Smart
Jennifer Lopez and Casper Smart in Rome, sword-fighting in front of the legendary Coliseum. Photo courtesy of Casper Smart
Kristin Cavallari revealed her baby bump. Photo courtesy of Kristin Cavallari.
Kristin Cavallari revealed her baby bump. Photo courtesy of Kristin Cavallari.
Lindsay Lohan flashing artistic side boob. Photo coutesy of Lindsay Lohan
Lindsay Lohan flashing artistic side boob. Photo coutesy of Lindsay Lohan
Miranda Kerr in a nostalgic throwback to her Angels. Photo courtesy of Miranda Kerr
Miranda Kerr in a nostalgic throwback to her Angels. Photo courtesy of Miranda Kerr
Jessica Simpson looking slim for her Weight Watchers commercial. Photo Courtesy of Jessica Simpson.
Jessica Simpson looking slim for her Weight Watchers commercial. Photo Courtesy of Jessica Simpson.
Kelly Clarkson's wedding picture. Photo Courtesy of Kelly Clarkson.
Kelly Clarkson’s wedding picture. Photo Courtesy of Kelly Clarkson.

Lindsay Lohan to Oprah: “I’m an addict.”

The public might point and laugh at failure, but they also clap for a good comeback story, and if Lindsay Lohan turns this train wreck around, she’ll be welcomed alongside Robert Downey Jr. Sure she’s had a lot of second chances, but so do most addicts, because it takes time to curb the chaos. Her Oprah interview seems to be the first time she’s ever taken full responsibility for her wrongdoings and surrendered to her addiction. Watch her admit to her alcoholism below.

Lindsay Lohan’s Oprah Interview — New Sneak Peak

Is Lindsay Lohan “addicted to chaos?” Oprah sure wants to know. The tabloid queen will sit down for a one-on-one interview, and it looks as if the talk show titan asked her everything the public wants to know. Here’s hoping this interview isn’t a bit premature, and Lindsay keeps it together.

First Look: Lindsay Lohan on Oprah’s Next Chapter

Oprah and actress Lindsay Lohan come together for an exclusive, highly anticipated conversation.

Tune in Sunday, August 18, at 9/8c.

Oprah Interviews Lindsay Lohan: WATCH a Clip

Call me heartless, but isn’t orange the worst hue for Lindsay’s Lohan’s comeback conversation? Since she’s had some trouble with the law, the closeup causes a not so friendly reminder. As for the interview itself, here’s hoping this isn’t another empty proclamation of recovery. I’m always rooting for a good turn-around. Watch a preview of Oprah’s interview, which will air August 18th.

Radar Online Exposes Lindsay Lohan’s Rehab Struggles — Has the Tabloid Gone Too Far?

I’ve always attempted to avoid bad-mouthing celebrities while at their most vulnerable. And I’ve certainly avoided recounting intimate details about their rehab-stints. But a recent article from Radar Online put me over the edge. I won’t link to it, but the online tabloid boasts about having the inside scoop on why Lohan moved rehabs, claiming that she skipped group therapy because she was convinced that they “were giving out information on her.” HELLO! Need I point out the obvious!? If this was merely an “excuse” then how does Radar Online even know about it?!! And if it wasn’t an excuse, and they were in fact giving out the information, then can you blame her for skipping it?!! Leave this girl alone. Sobriety is sacrosanct.

Charlie Sheen on Lindsay Lohan: “She Held Us Hostage”

If Charlie Seen calls out your antics, things are bad. Sheen appeared on Leno and confirmed the rumors that Lindsay Lohan’s tardiness tanked their Anger Management taping. Sheen would know a thing or two about struggling with addiction, but since he’s notorious for his professionalism regardless of his private “indulgences,” I’m assuming his empathy is limited. Watch below.

Lindsay Lohan v. Pitbull — Plagiarism, Corruption, & Blame Games

WRITTEN BY RIK SAULT, GUEST CONTRIBUTOR

Lindsay_LohanIn 2011, Lindsay Lohan filed suit against Pitbull for using her name in the lyrics to “Give Me Everything,” in which Pitbull proclaims, “I got it locked up like Lindsay Lohan.” Lohan alleged that this violated her privacy and publicity rights and caused her emotional distress.

Late last week, Lohan’s lawsuit was dismissed. US District Judge Denis Hurley ruled that the lyrics are a protected work of art under the First Amendment, and that even though the song was created and distributed to make a profit Lohan’s name was not “used for ‘advertising’ or ‘purposes of trade’ within the meaning of the New York Civil Rights Law.”

In Pitbull’s countersuit, his attorneys asked the court to sanction Lohan for filing a frivolous claim. The judge did not find Lohan’s suit to be frivolous, but he did impose a $1,500 fine on Lohan’s Long Island attorney, Stephanie G. Ovadia, for an “affront to the court,” — the briefs she filed were plagiarized from various sources. The judge said that “the vast majority of the opposition appears to have been taken from other sources without any acknowledgment or identification of those sources.” Moreover, while trying to defend or excuse the plagiarism, Lohan’s attorney made certain representations to the court that the judge found to be “undoubtedly false.”

In a smashing display of grace under fire, the Long Island attorney – who hired another attorney, Pery Krinsky, for the sanctions motion – tried to blame an attorney from Queens for the plagiarism, submitting that the Queens attorney acted as co-counsel for Lohan in the suit against Pitbull.

When reached for comment; however, the Queens attorney said he was not co-counsel for Lohan. “I do not believe in blame games,” he said, adding that he filed papers with the court that affirmed he was not co-counsel. “My affidavit clearly says that I was not an attorney for her.”

There are at least two lessons to be learned here. One, rap is an art, so don’t hesitate to express yourself. Two, Lindsay Lohan should not be allowed to choose her own attorney.

Lindsay Lohan’s Dad is Pregnant — Why Don’t Men Wear Condoms?

I’ve never understood a man’s desire to forgo the condom. I fundamentally reject the idea of putting my entire future in the hands of another person’s responsibility. There’s also that very obvious other reason, which is a major source of concern (pun intended — and not easy to ascertain). But congratulations to Lindsay Lohan, who will soon be a big sister for a fourth time.

Saturday Night Live’s “The Real Housewives of Disney” — Best Sketch Ever

Lindsay Lohan received a lot of criticism for her Saturday Night Live hosting job, but there’s one sketch that’s worth mentioning. There’s no need for me tell you why “The Real Housewives of Disney” was so great, just watch below and judge for yourself. I imagine that if Disney characters were real, that’s exactly how they would actually behave.