It’s Time for Richard Simmons to Get a New Outfit

Remember my previous post about branding your image in Hollywood? I officially take that back. Richard Simmons has been wearing the same workout outfit for a gazillion years, and his appearance on Wendy Williams was no exception. He’s a bit of a cartoon character, and since I’ve seen him actually make some good points in interviews, I find it off-putting that he is perpetuating this goof-ball shtick. I’m not advising him to act like Dan Rather, but it’s just getting old. Plus, whenever I see any man (no matter how good looking) in running shorts, I seriously want to vomit. Is there any outfit less flattering?

Dear Katy Perry — You Should Only Wear Latex Dresses

Branding is extremely important for a musician.  When you explode on the music scene, the first question is, “who is this person and what can I expect from them?”  Oops — that was two questions — forgive me.  For a pop singer, the answer to those questions is usually, “I’m no one and you can expect nothing from me.”  Okay — that was mean.  Anyways, Katy Perry has done a good job of staying relevant, and she’s actually really intelligent and sassy.  So I’d like to take a moment to give her some free Dishmaster advice.  Dear Katy Perry — from now on, you should only wear latex dresses.  The squeezed-in look is hot, and it’s better than Lady Gaga’s Schizophrenic style.  At the very least — it’s consistent and original.  See the pictures below, and let me know if you agree.