Once upon a time, after dating a guy for a few weeks, he invited me to his apartment. To avoid future awkwardness, I said, “Sure I’ll go. But just so we’re on the same page, I’m not having sex with you.” “Well forget it then,” he said. “I’m not interested in an old-fashioned courtship before I get laid.” So what’s the point of disclosing such personal Dishmaster details? In short, it’s to pose a question about whether Kalon is actually a douchebag for using the word “baggage” to define Emily Maynard’s daughter. Though he and my former date might need to revamp their verbal approach if they ever want a wife, there’s something admirable about brutal honestly.
Update: I forgot to mention Emily Maynard’s sassy response to Kalon’s comments. After Kalon apologized, Emily said, “You, my dear, should be a politician, because that’s the biggest load of **** I’ve ever heard,” followed by exposing his recent tweet, which repeated his original baggage comment. If only she showed this much personality on the actual show.
If you’re a fan of ‘The Bachelorette,’ then you know that every season of ABC’s show is met with spoilers from an internet blogger known as “Reality Steve.” It’s been the bane of ABC’s existence for years, and last year ABC received a long-awaited gift in their inbox when they discovered that Steve Carbone encouraged show contestants to violate their contract, which finally gave ABC cause to sue. They reached a settlement, but that settlement may or may not have banned Carbone from future spoilers. My guess is it didn’t, because he’s still spoiling the ending, and no one is stupid enough to so blatantly breach a contract with a big network. But according to Twitter, series creator Mike Fleiss thinks differently. Fleiss ranted about Carbone, calling him a “parasite,” and insisting that his spoilers hurt his show because, “no one wants to know who won the Super Bowl before sitting down to watch the game.” Although I understand Fleiss’ frustration, his example is sub-par. Viewers like to watch the show with knowledge of the final choice so they can look for the clues they might not have noticed otherwise. And furthermore, Mike Fleiss is a generally creepy dude that should probably stay off twitter. He likely has limited knowledge of the legal system and what would constitute a breach of contract, so in the end, he’s needlessly exposing his ignorance.
“I’d love to hear you talk, but not until I’m done. I got that line from you.” Emily Maynard’s line to Kalon shortly before kicking him out after finding out that he considers her daughter to be “baggage.” Watch the clip below.
Everyone knows that when you’re not fully over a boy, you still hope that no matter how many phone calls and text messages you ignore, he’ll show up at your door holding a stereo over his head while blasting Peter Gabriel music. But they just don’t make Lloyd Dobler the way they used to. So when I read Emily Maynard’s recap of The Bachelorette and realized that she thought it might be Brad Womack in the helicopter, it occurred to me that she’s not fully over him. Sure she said she was “relieved” when she saw it wasn’t him — but us chicks will say anything to convince the world of our own denial.
Ever since Ben Flajnik was eliminated on Ashley Hebert’s season of The Bachelorette, I’ve been saying he has anger issues. And he proved my point on last week’s show when he eliminated Samantha. She asked him why she has yet to receive an alone date and he scolded her for the inquiry. He called her highly emotional and impatient and then curtly told her to leave. Sure she seemed slightly nuts, but he’s an arrogant douche who should thank his lucky stars that a woman would even feign interest in him. Don’t pick on someone weaker than you, Ben. It’s just poor form.
When The Bachelorette’s Ashley Hebert reduced her romantic prospects down to a select few, I thought, “ABC is screwed on their next Bachelor. Everyone Ashley likes is boring and unattractive.” The network often picks a reject from the previous season to kick off the new season, because the viewers are already familiar with the star, which increases the likelihood of immediate ratings. But what do you do when the reject lacks the star power necessary to carry the series? In ABC’s case the answer is — cast him anyways. And they’ve paid the price with bad ratings. They should have cast someone entirely new, but I’m sure the powers-that-be felt it was too risky, considering their decision to cast the newbie Matt Grant led to its worst ratings of all time. It was a lose-lose. Perhaps Ashley Hubert should apologize to ABC for her taste in men.
Most of the time, I love being single. I love going out every night and not having to answer to anyone at the end of my day. Having said that, there are a few choice moments when I miss having a relationship. First, when I have to squash a bug. I need a man for that. Second, when I need my tire changed. And third, when I watch ‘The Bachelorette’ and see Ashley Hebert on my dream date. Watch below.
On today’s late night shows, you don’t often see the first guest stick around for the second guest. Mostly, they’ve got better things to do than to waste their time sitting next to someone less famous for an entire segment. The problem with this new tradition is that there’s nothing funnier than watching A-listers take a back-seat to Z-listers. Such was the case on ‘The Tonight Show,’ when The Bachelorette’s Ashley Hebert sat next to the legendary Larry David, who couldn’t resist chiming in on her love life. The result is comedic bliss. Watch below. Continue reading “Larry David Gives The Bachelorette Advice on ‘The Tonight Show’”