Once upon a time, after dating a guy for a few weeks, he invited me to his apartment. To avoid future awkwardness, I said, “Sure I’ll go. But just so we’re on the same page, I’m not having sex with you.” “Well forget it then,” he said. “I’m not interested in an old-fashioned courtship before I get laid.” So what’s the point of disclosing such personal Dishmaster details? In short, it’s to pose a question about whether Kalon is actually a douchebag for using the word “baggage” to define Emily Maynard’s daughter. Though he and my former date might need to revamp their verbal approach if they ever want a wife, there’s something admirable about brutal honestly.
Update: I forgot to mention Emily Maynard’s sassy response to Kalon’s comments. After Kalon apologized, Emily said, “You, my dear, should be a politician, because that’s the biggest load of **** I’ve ever heard,” followed by exposing his recent tweet, which repeated his original baggage comment. If only she showed this much personality on the actual show.
Everyone knows The Dishmaster loves curvy women, and everyone also knows that fashionistas don’t eat. So I predictably loved her response to a gossip website’s (whose name I’m deliberately omitting) ridiculous suggestion that she lose thirty pounds. And to celebrate Kate’s very sexy body, I’ve posted a video of her with famed photographer Terry Richardson. You’ll see why when you watch below.
It’s my secret agenda in every interview to befriend my subject. And Langhorne Slim certainly made the list. His real name is Sean Scolnick, and he might be the most normal, down-to-earth guy I’ve ever interviewed. In doing my research for his new record, The Way We Move, I realized that we have a lot in common, which is a data-point that will surely help in our future friendship. We’re both Jewish, and we both exited five-year relationships that were subject to long distances apart. Because I’m egocentric, I made sure to ask about these commonalities, along with questions about his joyful, dance-worthy style of music that I’ve fallen in love with. Read below.
Do you refer to yourself as Langhorne, or do your friends call you Sean?
It’s different. Some call me Sean, some call me Langhorne, some call me Seany Boy, some call me Slim. I’ve got lots of names. It just depends on who’s talking to me.
Is it true you wrote this album while mourning a breakup?
I wrote a few of the songs after my wonderful ex and I broke up, but a lot of the songs were [previously] written. [When] we went into the studio to record the record, we had already broken up.
Is it difficult to record in such an emotional place?
It was a difficult period, but it was amazing to have that kind of release, and to feel it in such a raw, immediate way. Instead of leaping off a cliff, I had this creative outlet.
I assume “Someday” is directly about the breakup, right?
The funny thing is . . . we were still together. Maybe you’re breaking-up before you realize it.
Do you ever get a call from an ex who is combing through your songs and wants to know if it’s about her?
They know that it is. I’m a man that hasn’t been with very many women. The last fifteen years of my life I’ve been in relationships. My ex knows exactly what songs are about her, because she heard me writing them.
Is it hard to sing songs that remind you of the time when you wrote them?
When I listen to [this record], it takes me very much back to that time and place, and I think that it always will. But it’s freeing. Even if you’re singing about pain, it’s a blessing to be able to create something that gets me through it. I don’t feel the heartbreak, I feel the release.
You raised the money for this album through PledgeMusic, which requires you to fulfill some very random promises to fans you’ve never met. I know you’re Jewish, and if I told my over-protective Jewish mother about the promises I’d have to fulfill, she’d kill me. Was your mother concerned?
I’m ten years into [my career], and my mother embraces it. [But] I remember the first time we ever got booked in Europe, she said, “Okay, wait a second. You’re going to Italy to play for some random people? How do you know they’re not going to kill you?” [laughs]. Now [my family] gets it. They knew I wasn’t cut out for a conventional job. Thankfully, they supported [me]. [They’re] still neurotic though.
You’ve toured with some heavy-hitters. Before you go on tour, do you think about whether you’ll get along on a personal level?
At this point it’s a little different. We’re in a position of picking who we tour with. [But] when we were going out with other bands, it wasn’t random. It already comes with a bit of a connection. There’s already a respect.
What about in your own band? Is it tough to be in close quarters for an extended period of time?
You learn each other’s eccentricities. It’s very much like a romantic relationship, but the romance is creative and musical.
How do you sustain a romantic relationship when you tour for 8 months out of the year?
I don’t know. People have told me it’s not feasible. But I did it the entire time I was a touring musician. It’s difficult to connect on a day-to-day basis, but I believe in it still. I’m a big, sappy believer in love. I feel like it’s just as difficult in different ways to have a 9to5 job and come home to each other every day. It’s a different set of challenges.
Do you have a favorite song on your new record?
The song that’s really meaningful to me is “A Song for Sid.” I wrote it for my grandfather. I’m very happy with it. You were asking if I’m brought back to the heartbreak or pain of a song that I wrote, and I am brought back [with that song], but in a beautiful way. It’s a tribute to him that he would probably feel proud of me for writing.
Watch below to see the video for Langhorne Slim & The Law’s single, “The Way We Move.” And thanks to Sean for proving that you can be talented and normal at the same time.
I received the video below in my inbox, and my love for the Step Up franchise meant I had to post it. The newest installment, ‘Step Up Revolution,’ takes place in Miami, and according to my press release, here’s what it’s about: “Emily (Kathryn McCormick) arrives in Miami with aspirations of becoming a professional dancer and soon falls in love with Sean (Ryan Guzman), a young man who leads a dance crew in elaborate, cutting-edge flash mobs, called “The Mob.” When a wealthy business man threatens to develop The Mob’s historic neighborhood and displace thousands of people, Emily must band together with Sean and The Mob to turn their performance art into protest art, and risk losing their dreams to fight for a greater cause.” If that plot doesn’t strike your fancy, it doesn’t really matter — the story is always secondary to the dancing anyhow. Watch below.
This story was just interesting enough to post. According to the New York Post, there’s a hot demand amongst the Hamptons elite for guinea hens. Christie Brinkley and Billy Joel started the craze in 1990 when they conducted an experiment on their property, which “showed the correlation between guinea fowl and reduced deer tick populations.” The craziest part of this story is the idea that Christie Brinkley and Billy Joel worked well enough together to conduct an experiment. The second craziest part is the vision of a bunch of rich, crazy celebrities with hens running all over their property.
Part two of the Real Housewives of Orange County reunion will likely be one of the best in history when Vicki reveals that Don cheated on her for 20 years of their marriage. I found this to be especially shocking considering that Vicki often looked like a villain and yet she avoided the opportunity to drag his name through the mud. But she finally hit her breaking point when her daughter exposed that Vicki and Brooks’ relationship went further back than anyone realized. Watch below.
This is a hit I never saw coming. Steven Tyler officially announced that he’s leaving American Idol, saying, “I strayed from my first love, Aerosmith, and I’m back.” It’s rumored that Jennifer Lopez is on her way out also, which is mostly attributed to her recent career resurgence. I can’t help but wonder if his announcement is a fancy way of saying, “they didn’t ask me back,” but I’ll squash my internal cynic for a moment and make an even more cynical comment: His exit is completely irrelevant. His “everyone-is-wonderful” attitude didn’t add much to the show, and it only served to hurt his rock-star brand. So welcome back to the real world, Steven. We missed you over here.
When people tell me they don’t understand fashion, I tell them they don’t understand art. And to gain a better understanding of what I mean, please visit the de Young Museum in San Francisco to see “The Fashion World of Jean Paul Gaultier: From the Sidewalk to the Catwalk.” The exhibit is open until August 19th, and it features some very interesting mannequins that Gaultier designed with the Ubu Compagnie de Création theater company. You’ll see the timeline of his designs, along with sketches and videos from concerts that featured his work, most notably Madonna. Watch below to preview the exhibit
If you’re a fan of ‘The Bachelorette,’ then you know that every season of ABC’s show is met with spoilers from an internet blogger known as “Reality Steve.” It’s been the bane of ABC’s existence for years, and last year ABC received a long-awaited gift in their inbox when they discovered that Steve Carbone encouraged show contestants to violate their contract, which finally gave ABC cause to sue. They reached a settlement, but that settlement may or may not have banned Carbone from future spoilers. My guess is it didn’t, because he’s still spoiling the ending, and no one is stupid enough to so blatantly breach a contract with a big network. But according to Twitter, series creator Mike Fleiss thinks differently. Fleiss ranted about Carbone, calling him a “parasite,” and insisting that his spoilers hurt his show because, “no one wants to know who won the Super Bowl before sitting down to watch the game.” Although I understand Fleiss’ frustration, his example is sub-par. Viewers like to watch the show with knowledge of the final choice so they can look for the clues they might not have noticed otherwise. And furthermore, Mike Fleiss is a generally creepy dude that should probably stay off twitter. He likely has limited knowledge of the legal system and what would constitute a breach of contract, so in the end, he’s needlessly exposing his ignorance.
