This season of ‘Celebrity Apprentice’ has largely been a letdown, but last night’s episode was a strong exception, as it rose some serious issues about gender roles and the LGBT movement. In an assignment to create a marketing campaign for Kawaski motorcycles, the men’s team created a left-of-center product, which saw a naked Carson Kressley atop a bike, along with a drag queen, and Vince Neil holding a Yorkie. When Kressley and Boy George proposed the idea, it became immediately clear that some men were uncomfortable, notably MMA fighter Chael Sonnen. Though he mostly kept quiet, his facial expressions spoke volumes. A joke made by Jon Lovitz about an “overhug” with Kressley also indicated his latent discomfort. While I don’t think it’s helpful to place blame on a straight man’s discomfort around drag queens and homosexuals, society is evolving, and they should too.
As for the gender issues, things took a turn for the worse when David Charvet resisted his wife’s request to ride on the back of the motorcycle for “macho” reasons, and he predictably received a world of hurt on twitter the following day, such as “Way to go, David Charvet. Throwing a fit over a pic makes you look like a bigger bitch than if you’d just ridden bitch.” Charvet then subsequently liked a fan comment, which said, “I can’t even read this fembot crap anymore, how programmed are people? Men being men is now not only frowned upon, but engendered.” Burke held firm in defending her man,which disturbed me even more. According to Brooke Burke, because her husband would not ride in the back in real life, the shot would be “inauthentic.” Arnold Schwarzenegger rightfully responded, indicating he’d have zero issue with riding behind Burke on a bike. His comment is a specific jab at David Charvet, because if The Terminator doesn’t subscribe to gender stereotypes, David Charvet certainly should not. I understand that Burke was in an impossible position, because she’s loyal to her husband and certainly cannot bad mouth him in public. In fact, she should have known him better and never suggested the shot in the first place, so as not to expose his hidden sexism. And while I enjoy the social media firestorm Charvet is receiving, I know it won’t move the needle and will only serve to make him defensive. No matter what our age, we can still learn, evolve, and change, and Charvet is no exception. Perhaps he can see this episode, understand the changing times, and realize that in today’s world, “tradition” is no excuse for sexism. Furthermore, a man whose comfortable with a woman taking the lead, is far more masculine than a man who is not.
Only Donald Trump would score one his greatest All-Stars of all time and then fire him to prove a point. It’s astounding, especially considering that it’s a bad ratings move. When I first saw that Trump had an all-star cast, I naturally assumed I’d see the return of Piers Morgan, John Rich, and Joan Rivers. Instead, he landed most of his losers and insulted the only guy with drawing power. Furthermore, when an entire task is predicated on a celebrity’s fundraising Rolodex, it makes for boring television. Most of the donating stars don’t show up on television, and the show becomes a waiting game for the final money-count. What made Bret Michaels a badass wasn’t his ability to garner money, it was his intelligence and creative choices on each task. To deprive me of watching him at his best is infuriating. Watch the new-season trailer below.
When Adam Carolla offered Arsenio Hall his podcast “crew” to help film Magic Johnson for a spot promoting The Magic Johnson Foundation, I couldn’t have anticipated the hilarious result. Apparently, Adam’s “crew” is really a group of intellectually stunted individuals who think “camera left” means “turn Magic Johnson to the left.” Watch below and be prepared to laugh very hard.
If you’ve been watching Celebrity Apprentice, then you’re likely just as disturbed as The Dishmaster about the demise of Arsenio Hall. There was a time when this man ruled the world, and he has somehow become a sheepish nerd who has lost his way. Only Aubrey O’Day could properly explain the phenomenon. Watch below.
Lisa Lampanelli’s behavior on Celebrity Apprentice placed her on my Dishmaster shit-list, and her despicable attacks on Dayana Mendoza during Sunday’s episode solidified that status for eternity. I actually think Lampanelli is a bigot, and the language barrier between her and Mendoza is what breeds Lampanelli’s assertions that Mendoza is “stupid.” Translation? — She’s vicious, and it’s unacceptable. I’m shocked that no one told-off Lampanelli in the clip below. In fact, I think she needs medication.
This post is a week delayed, but it was so disturbing it could not go unmentioned. When Lisa Lampanelli found herself in the boardroom next to Lou Ferrigno on Celebrity Apprentice, she fought to the death to stay in the competition, which included verbally beating Lou Ferrigno to a pulp. If you’d like to see a bully in action, watch the clip below. I actually felt sorry for Lou Ferrigno. Just because you’re on a reality show doesn’t excuse acting like an assh*le.
Two weeks ago on Celebrity Apprentice, Penn Jillette had a fight with Clay Aiken about a fundraising task which involved Jillette’s very well-known Vegas friends and performers, Blue Man Group. In short, Blue Man Group agreed to donate eight thousand dollars, but they delivered it by popping a money-filled-balloon at the end of their performance, which resulted in some of the money being lost to random people on the street. Aiken was furious at the lost money, and he basically called Jillette ridiculous for the entire idea. After reading Jillette’s incredibly moving and well-written article on the Huffington Post about what happened, I’m officially in love with him. He described his love of art as more powerful than his love of money, and he detailed his struggle in explaining that to Trump and Aiken, saying, “Trying to explain to Donald Trump that beauty and art can be more important than money is like trying to explain to Donald Trump that beauty and art can be more important than money.” He also said that this was the “episode where Donald Trump understood that he didn’t understand me, and feeling misunderstood by Donald Trump and Clay Aiken is its own kind of joy.” Wow. Here’s hoping I can interview Penn Jillette one day.
“It turns out that if you put a camera in front of anybody, not just a narcissistic amoral celebrity, but actually a good human being, if you put a camera on them for four, five, six hours and tell them to simply be careful what they say, not even in any particular direction but just weigh each word before you say it, and if you do that for like a bunch of hours without giving that person a break, that person ends up with their willpower depleted. They lose the same kind of governing that people get when they’re really drunk. It’s fascinating to watch people who are being careful about what they say and trying to come off very well lose that governing.” Penn Jillette on his choice to do Celebrity Apprentice, and what he learned about reality television and human nature from the experience.
I’ve often said if only all of the Beatles were still alive so I could put them on Celebrity Apprentice, and it turns out most of America agrees with me.” Howard Stern, on his fantasy of figuring out the smartest member of The Beatles by putting them on Celebrity Apprentice.
I’ve never in my entire life watched a one-hour show and thought, “you know what would be really great — if this show was two hours long.” In fact, I often find myself infuriated when I’m forced to fast-forward through a large portion of Celebrity Apprentice, presumably because the producers think the show is so fantastic that they refuse to edit out the extraneous material. ‘The Voice’ is hopping on board the piss-off-The-Dishmaster train, by expanding their one hour show to two hours. I imagine that since the ratings are great, they want to use the show for all its worth, thereby maximizing their ad revenue. Here’s the problem — adding an hour fatigues the viewers and inevitably sacrifices the quality of the show. When you get greedy, you lose your cash-cow.