When Jennifer Garner told Vanity Fair that she “looks forward to having a sense of humor” again after her divorce from Ben Affleck, I thought, “If this interview is any indication, then she is well on her way.” I’ve read a lot of Jennifer Garner interviews over the years, and her sweet disposition always makes my teeth ache, but it’s usually bogged down by the burdens of the back-and-forth and her presumably busy schedule managing a marriage and three kids. This interview is different. She’s clearly in pain and willing to give an honest account of how her marriage broke down — but she’s bubbly, and it floats to the surface. Much like Jennifer Aniston, Gwyneth Paltrow, and Nicole Kidman, she also has a great zinger for her ex, insulting his newest tattoo, saying, “You know what we would say in my hometown about that? ‘Bless his heart.’ A phoenix rising from the ashes. Am I the ashes in this scenario?” So how does she manage losing the man she calls “the love of her life” along with “the dream of dancing with [her] husband at my daughter’s wedding?” With Tina Fey and Amy Poehler, of course. And speaking of dancing, it’s a common theme throughout the interview, which is no surprise since she danced for “six hours a day” as a child. And in another hilarious quote she says, “My cross to bear is that my children have no interest in ballet. I think they could smell how much I wanted to put their hair in a bun.” While she didn’t give a direct reason for the demise of her marriage, I think this quote about Affleck sums it up: ‘When his sun shines on you, you feel it.’ But when the sun is shining elsewhere, it’s cold. He can cast quite a shadow.” Head to Vanity Fair for more.
Jennifer Aniston didn’t take too kindly to the shock surrounding her John Mayer romance, insisting they adored each other and dismissing the eight year age difference. Mayer ran his mouth about their relationship, and the couple split shortly thereafter. He has since dated just about everyone in Hollywood.
9. DAVID COPPERFIELD AND CLAUDIA SCHIFFER
David Copperfield worked his magic on Claudia Schiffer after calling her on stage during one of his acts. Their quick collaboration turned into a 6 year engagement, which ended in 1999. They said their busy work schedules were to blame.
8. SANDRA BULLOCK & JESSE JAMES
When America’s sweetheart ended up with outspoken bad boy Jesse James, people were less than pleased, but the backlash died down when she vouched for their bond during many interviews and acceptance speeches. Their story ended sadly; however, when tabloids got wind of James’ affair and the odd couple called it quits.
7. LYLE LOVETT AND JULIA ROBERTS
Lyle Lovett and Julia Roberts’ love story ended just as quickly as it began, marrying merely three weeks after meeting and later divorcing in just under two years. The two remained friends and blamed their work schedules for the split.
6. CAMERON DIAZ AND BENJI MADDEN
Benji Madden might seem like a strong departure from her previous picks, but perhaps Cameron Diaz went for the nice guy for once. The A-list actress is clearly smitten with her husband, given that she previously swore of marriage in every interview.
5. DUDLEY MOORE & SUSAN ANTON
4. RYAN REYNOLDS & ALANIS MORISSETTE
Ryan Reynolds has proposed three times to date, beginning with Alanis Morissette, whom he dated for five years before calling it quits in 2007. Less than a year later, Reynolds was engaged to Scarlett Johansson. He is now married to Blake Lively. Morissette admits that her album “Flavors of Entanglement,” is inspired by the grief associated with their breakup.
3. BRAD PITT & JULIETTE LEWIS
2. DREW BARRYMORE & TOM GREEN
Drew Barrymore and Tom Green’s whirlwind romance ended just months after they married. Though Green rarely discusses what went wrong, he admits that their issues surfaced while planning the wedding but they went through with it anyhow. They no longer keep in touch.
- ANGELINA JOLIE & BILLY BOB THORNTON
Angelina Jolie and Billy Bob Thornton’s weird romance made some serious waves, most notably when the creepy couple wore vials of each other’s blood around their necks as an expression of love. Their public displays of affection also caused concern, with many suggesting that the red carpet might not be the best place for sloppy tongue kisses. The couple divorced soon after Angelina adopted her first child, and Thornton later admitted that her success stalled the relationship, as he simply couldn’t handle it. She removed the tattoo of his name, but the two still remain friends.
Did Matt Barnes lie about dating Rihanna? WGO
Kelly Clarkson is pregnant with her second child. Refinery29
Josh Duggar is awful. Pajiba
Kylie Jenner’s 18th birthday just resulted in a huge payday for Tyga. Hollywood Life
Ciara responded to her ex’s objection to her new boyfriend being around her son. People
Megan Fox and Brian Austen Green are over. D Listed
Julianne Hough is engaged. E! Online
That subway guy is a creep. TMZ
Heidi Klum thinks every woman is a ten, and Donald Trump should too. Mashable
Are Wiz Khalifa and Rita Ora dating? Bossip
Joseph Gordon Levitt is a dad. USA Today
A ‘Teen Mom’ couple tied the knot. MTV
Jennifer Aniston has a very beautiful wedding ring. Moviefone
T.I. owes a lot in back taxes.Wet Paint
Nicki Minaj’s ex cheated on her. TMZ
Leonardo DiCaprio has a new model girlfriend. Buzzfeed
Jennifer Aniston says Justin Theroux is the best part of her 40’s. People
Nick Jonas might be single. Gossip Girl
Taylor Swift and Calvin Harris are insta-official. Unreality TV
Kevin Federline really did love Britney Spears. Fish Wrapper
Ariana Grande is going in a new romantic direction. JSYK
Prince George is adorable. USA Today
Kim Kardashian thinks South West is a dumb baby name. Just Jared
Carrie Underwood has really hot legs. HUFFPO
Emma Roberts and Evan Peters ended their engagement. E! Online
Benedict Cumberbatch had a baby. The Frisky
Teen Mom’s Farrah Abraham is back on the market. Wet Paint
Brody Jenner and his girlfriend like threesomes. Rumor Fix
John Stamos got a DUI. People
Jennifer Lawrence and Chris Martin never split. The Stir
Jennifer Aniston praised Angelina Jolie. E! Online
Cristiano Ronaldo and Irina Shayk ended their 5 year romance. Just Jared
The Brandi Glanville / Joanna Krupa war rages on. Jezebel
Maggie G. and Dylan McDermott got engaged. What’s New
Naya Rivera doesn’t like to shower. Pop Sugar
Robin Wright and Ben Foster are back together. NYDN
Katy Perry and John Mayer have rekindled their romance. People
Michael Sam is engaged. HUFFPO
The film follows David Burke, a small-time pot dealer who agrees to smuggle drugs across the Mexican border after his entire stash was stolen. He commissions a local stripper named Rose (Jennifer Aniston) to play his wife, in hopes that a faux family might help avert border patrol from any suspicion. He also convinces two troubled teens to act as his children, and the usual antics ensue when just about everything goes wrong.
There’s not much to say about this film other than it’s mildly entertaining with mediocre jokes and an enjoyable cast. But it could have been funnier. That being said, I’d still recommend it. It’s a good enough distraction from your Sunday stroll.
OVERALL RATING: 2.5/5 DISHES