To be fair, the title is a joke — but so is Kim Kardashian and Kanye West’s poor baby’s new name. And those cruel new parents didn’t even give this little girl the option of a middle name to opt out of their preposterous pick. Watch Kris Jenner justify their choice on The View.
Author: The Dishmaster
Did Miley Cyrus Just Expose Her Father’s Affair? — UH OH!!!
And you thought your life was ridiculous. While I’m not a Miley Cyrus fan and rarely mention her on The Dishmaster, this story is too good to resist. Rumor has it that Cyrus took to twitter to take down her pops, demanding that Bill Ray Cyrus tell the truth within the hour or “she will tell it for him.” She then posted a picture of herself beside Dylis Croman, who starred with Billy in Chicago on Broadway. The demanded and accompanying photo has obviously led many to assume Miley’s outrage surrounds an affair between her father and Croman. All the tweets have since been deleted, with a comment from Cyrus saying, that her twitter is “acting crazy.” Um . . . something’s acting crazy and it might not be twitter.
This might be the right time to remember the finer days when celebrities had zero access to the general public. Those digital muzzles were made for people like Miley, who can’t seem to control her own impulse to damage her own PR with personal-life posts. In memory of better times, watch below for a vintage interview of Miley and her father.
Paula Deen & Hollis Johnson — The Racism Continues
I’ve never met a racist who identifies as racist. In fact, Paula Deen’s ease of recounting her use of racist terms in her lawsuit is not shocking, given that bigots egocentrically assume the world is on their side.
The latest update about Paula Deen’s collapsed empire is a video from a New York Times interview, in which Deen openly discusses racism, referring to her family’s devastation about the end of the Civil War. According to Deen, her grandfather was extremely depressed about having “no one to operate his plantation.” And by “no one,” she means slaves. The worst part of the video; however, revolves around a man named Hollis Johnson, who works for Deen. Deen calls him to the stage and seemingly feels she deserves a medal for having a black friend whom she treats as an equal. Watch below.
Tabloid Brief — The Week of News
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- Katy Perry is madly in love with John Mayer. MTV
- Greg Louganis is engaged. People
- Eddie Murphy’s girlfriend is hot. The Blemish
- Kim Kardashian clearly had laser hair removal. Huffington Post
- Mila Kunis turned down Russell Brand. Contact Music
- Heather Locklear & Tom Cruise had a dancing date. Us Magazine
- Kate Upton might have a new man. TheHollywoodGossip
- Real Housewife Nene Leakes tied the knot. LifeandStyle
- Bon Jovi’s tour is suffering without Richie Sambora. Fashion&Style
- Kim Kardashian & Kanye West finally named their baby. Yahoo
- Leighton Meester & Adam Brody are still going strong. JustJared
- Paula Deen has a black friend. WetPaint
- Mel Gibson torments child stars now. Lainey Gossip
- Bethenny Frankel & Jason Hoppy are acting like children. RadarOnline
- Miley Cyrus is going to teach Britney Spears how to twerk. Zap2It
- Chris Brown axed Rihanna from his album. The Sun
- Maria Sharapova and Serena Williams hate each other. TMZ
‘The X Factor’ Long Island Auditions — What the Judges are Wearing
The X Factor auditions are underway and America’s new judges have made their chic Long Island entrance in some fresh favorites. Snag their style by checking out the designers under each photo.
Gloves: Piumelli
Shoes: Charlotte Olympia
Hat: Worth and Worth
Jewelry: Vita Fede
Bottoms: Theory
Shoes: Saint Laurent
Shoes: Nicholas Kirkwood
Paula Deen Apologize for Racist Slurs — WATCH NOW
If you’re going to issue a public apology, you better be contrite. And contrition is nearly impossible to convey. It certainly doesn’t help when there’s no interviewer to navigate when the subject falls short. Such is the case with Paula Deen, whose PR team proved their incompetence by allowing the dolty diva to fly solo in monologue format. In case you missed it, the high-calorie cook got in hot water when her racist comments in a law suit became public. And given that she barely dodged a tanked empire when her diabetes got discovered, this double-dose of damage is disastrous.
Watch her bloated mess of an apology below.
Armie Hammer Talks Married Sex With Playboy — Quote of the Day
Photo Courtesy of Lorenzo Agius/Playboy
“I don’t know how much we can put here without my parents being embarrassed, but I used to like to be a dominant lover. I liked the grabbing of the neck and the hair and all that. But then you get married and your sexual appetites change. And I mean that for the better—it’s not like I’m suffering in any way. But you can’t really pull your wife’s hair. It gets to a point where you say, ‘I respect you too much to do these things that I kind of want to do.’ The two of us will literally break out laughing in the middle of it, finish up and be like, ‘Well, that was oddly fun!’ So it becomes a new kind of thing that’s less about ‘I want to dominate you’ and more about both of us having a really good time. It’s just a different style.” Armie Hammer in Playboy magazine’s July/August 20Q, on sex with his wife pre and post marriage.
Snoop Dogg Releases ‘Let the Bass Go’ Lyric Video
I’ve never understood the Snoop Dogg fascination, but since I’m the only one on the planet with that declaration, I’ve decided to post his new lyric video. The song, ‘Let the Bass Go,’ appears in ‘Turbo,’ the upcoming film from Dreamworks Animation. The film follows a snail who dreams of speed and wants to race the Indy 500. Watch the fun video below.
Cher Releases ‘Woman’s World’ — WATCH lyric video now.
Miley Cyrus Debuts We Can’t Stop Video — I Can’t Stop Watching It
If Pink and Dracula had a baby, it would probably produce the new Miley Cyrus. That being said, it pains me to admit I like her new video. I find her style to be a bit inauthentic, given that it reeks of a desperate attempt to debut a new image, but I’ll give her the benefit of the doubt and assume her edge is god-given. I’m not a fan of her doggy-style simulations on the bed — but you can’t have everything I suppose. WATCH BELOW.