I don’t usually comment on celebrities in trouble, mostly because it’s not funny, and I try to keep this blog as light as possible. But when I stumbled across a video of Tara Reid discussing her “never-married-marriage,” I had to post it. The blogosphere annihilates Tara Reid for her public debauchery, but I’m just sad for her. There’s something very wrong in the video below, and I hope she gets help. No sense picking on someone when they’re down, other than to say that if her family isn’t pointing out her desperate need for help, then I will.
Category: General
Dr. Drew Interviews Courtney Stodden — Deplorable
Remember when Dr. Drew was a real doctor? Now he’s just one of those television hacks that preys on the downfall of celebrities. And to make matters worse, he has a new, purposeless show that involves interviewing Z-list celebrities. Those “celebrities” include the 51 year old Doug Hutchinson (also known as “pedophile”) and the 17 year old Courtney Stodden (also known as “suffering from Stockholm syndrome”). And forgive me for picking on little children — but what’s wrong with Courtney Stodden’s face?
Maksim Chmerkovskiy v. Len Goodman — It’s War
Though I’d love for the very yummy Maksim Chmerkovskiy to show me that feisty temper in the privacy of my bedroom, it doesn’t fit on Dancing With the Stars. When Len Goodman insulted his Rumba, Maksim riled the audience and promoted their boos, which incited Len Goodman’s rage. Maksim then said that the professional dancers “kill themselves only to hear judgmental comments.” First, what did Maksim think he signed up for? This is a dancing show, and there are three judges on the panel that are paid to actually judge his dance. Second, it’s supposed to be fun. And he’s not being very fun. Third, his Rumba was terrible. Hope looked awkward and it had zero sex appeal. Did he expect a standing ovation? And finally, please don’t vote him off. He’s just too damn beautiful to look at every week.
Nicole Sherzinger’s New Single, ‘Try With Me’ — Terrible
If you watch X Factor, then you’re familiar with the excessively pompous Nicole Scherzinger who has made it clear on numerous occasions that she can actually sing. So you can imagine my bliss when I discovered her wretched new single, ‘Try With Me’, where the vocals are nearly unrecognizable amidst an auto-tuned mess. Haven’t we heard enough of this wretched sound? Isn’t it time for evolution to phase out these types of singers? Where’s Darwin when you need him. Listen below.
Kelly Clarkson Still Bad-Mouths Ryan Tedder — Classless
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Hasn’t Kelly Clarkson learned her lesson about bad-mouthing heavy hitters in the industry? To promote her new album, ‘Stronger’, Clarkson revisited the Ryan Tedder controversy and once again accused him of giving her and Beyonce the same song. The two songs in question are Beyonce’s ‘Halo’ and Clarkson’s ‘Already Gone.’ Clarkson learned of the similarity after watching YouTube mashups and she later pointed the finger at Tedder in the press. Tedder was rightfully pissed that Clarkson smeared his song-writing reputation.
In an effort to give Clarkson the benefit of the doubt, I played both songs for my musician friend, Steve Aho, who said that, although they sound similar, “it’s a very common chord progression” that “isn’t even identical.” Since I’ve done my musical research, I can now safely say that Kelly Clarkson is irresponsible and classless. You do not bad-mouth a musician because some douchey people made YouTube mashups of your song. Perhaps she should write her own material so she needn’t worry about this nonsense. Oh wait — she did — and it didn’t work.
Alexis Stewart on ‘The Today Show’ — Confirms She’s Horrible
Alexis Stewart appeared on ‘The Today Show’ to promote her new book, ‘Whateverland,’ and it’s obvious she should immediately check into therapy. First, she was clearly annoyed by the Martha Stewart related questions, which is hilarious considering the book would never be published without her mother’s name. Second, she co-wrote the book with Jennifer Koppelman-Hutt, who she’s no longer friends with. When asked why the friendship ended, Stewart gave vague answers, but reiterated a quote from her book, saying, “If you want to punish somebody, never talking to them is a good method.” It didn’t surprise me that Koppelman-Hutt couldn’t answer the question either, given her recent appearance on Howard Stern where she divulged she has absolutely no idea why Alexis banished her from her life. What exactly happened during Alexis Stewart’s life to make her such a horrible, angry person? And furthermore, who wants to buy an advice book from someone that needs twelve of their own? Perhaps the ‘Whateverland’ title should be changed to “Why-I-Gratuitously-Drop-My-Friends-And Hate-Life.”
Mariah Carey Reveals Twins — Babara Walters Interview
It’s great to see Mariah Carey back to her normal self in an interview. She’s usually slightly nuts, and only Barbara Walters can bring out the Mariah we loved at the beginning of her career. She finally unveiled her adorable twins, and though they seem incredibly cute, I get the strange feeling that there’s some marital animosity going on. For example, when Walters asked Mariah if she trusts Cannon, Mariah responds with, “sometimes.” Watch below.
Quote of the Day — Kate Winslet
“I ran into the bedroom and put on a bra. In disastrous moments like that, you do the strangest things. I started to put on a bra and thought ‘No, that’s going to take me too long,’ so off came the bra, on came the t-shirt, I grabbed the children and I picked up Granny.” Kate Winslet on how she handled the fire at Richard Branson’s house, where she famously picked up Branson’s mother, or “Granny”, and carried her down the stairs.
GQ Responds to Taylor Lautner Controversy — Falls Short
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I give Dustin Lance Black a lot of credit. Not only is he an Oscar winning writer, but he also champions against the gratuitous homophobia in Hollywood. In response to Taylor Lautner’s GQ interview in which he was asked whether the openly gay Gus Van Sant and Dustin Lance Black hit on him, Black said:
Really Mr. GQ writer? I’m curious, will you be asking all of the handsome actors I’ve ever had the privilege of working with or meeting if I made passes at them as well? I’d love to be there when you ask Sean Penn that same question. Or, Mr. GQ writer, were you projecting your own unprofessional desires onto me and Gus? Perhaps? Or worse still, are you a homophobe?
GQ predictably avoided responsibilty, saying;
We’ve seen some of the comments floating around regarding our recent interview with Taylor Lautner and apologise if anyone was offended by anything in the article. It certainly wasn’t our intention to paint anyone in the story as a sexual predator. The point we were actually trying to push was that Taylor is irresistible to virtually everyone — regardless of sexuality or gender. Hence the film crew cheering at his shirtless scenes while shooting Twilight, and Mark Wahlberg deeming him better looking than Leonardo DiCaprio.
GQ’s defense is ridiculous. If I directed Taylor Lautner, would it be appropriate to ask him if I offered him matzah during the course of the shoot? After all, what kind of Jew would I be without it? Seriously though — despite GQ’s defense — they would not have asked the same question about a female director or writer.
