Ciara’s Video Banned from BET — Has Sex With Her Clothes On?

Alright, this is certainly old news, but when Ciara reminded Chelsea Lately of the controversy surrounding her ‘Ride’ video, I had no choice but to watch it.  Remember that girl at high school dances that basically had sex with the floor, and you thought — wow, that girl is NOT a virgin.  Yeah — I think we can all agree that Ciara’s had plenty of sex.  Call me a prude, but who knew these moves even existed?  As an aside, I find it interesting that videos can get banned based on dancing alone and not nudity.  She’s wearing some kind of unitard that completely covers her body — yet she’s — well — just watch it.

Why Can The CW Pick Actors But Not Shows?

Leighton Meester is getting a lot of attention for her new film with Gwenyth Paltrow, Country Strong, and I can’t help but wonder if the people at The CW are happy.  Gossip Girl is Meester’s career launching role, and it gets a lot of media buzz, but no ratings.  That’s always baffled me, especially considering that I religiously watch Gossip Girl, despite falling outside their target tweenie demographic.  But Meester isn’t the only actress from The CW to become extremely successful.  What about Blake Lively?  She also began on Gossip Girl, and she’s now had three major movie roles (Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants, Town, and The Green Hornet).  And let’s not forget Kristen Bell.  Bell’s career began on Veronica Mars, which also got press attention but failed in the ratings.  Like Meester and Lively, Bell has now moved on to major movie roles.  So what’s the problem?  Is it a CW marketing problem?  Perhaps.  When ratings don’t correspond with the quality of your show, you have to question marketing and promotion.  Plus, you’d think if your that good at picking talent, you’d be equally as good at running your network as a whole.

Movie Review — Love and Other Drugs

After seeing Anne Hathaway naked for most of this movie, I have two things to say.  First, she needs to stop doing interviews about how she’s unnattractive.  Second, if you’re wondering how to properly execute nudity in a movie without it feeling forced and gratuitous, then go see Love And Other Drugs — because Edward Zwick (the director) pulls it off masterfully.  The movie is about Maggie (Anne Hathaway) and Jamie (Jake Gyllenhaal), who accidentally fall into a relationship after fighting very hard against it.  Maggie has early onset Parkinson’s, and she’s afraid Jamie will eventually realize he can’t handle it and dump her.  Her solution is to dump him first.  Sounds like most women I know (minus the Parkinson’s).  Jamie is a womanizer whose affection for Maggie starts with sex and ends with love.  This movie survives solely on the insane chemistry between Anne Hathaway and Jake Gyllenhaal.  This is their second movie together, and I recommend they become a new, romantic team, much like Spencer Tracy and Katherine Hepburn.  Good chemistry is hard to come-by, and so are good love stories.  So go see the film.

Vintage Celebrity Feud: Roger Ebert v. Vincent Gallo

The Brown Bunny

Chloe Sevigny’s recent Playboy interview drew my attention to a very old feud, which was just juicy enough to recount.  In 2003, Sevigny starred in The Brown Bunny, a movie written and directed by Vincent Gallo.  The film gained a lot of negative attention because Sevigny performed “unsimulated fellatio” on Gallo.  Translation?  She actually blew him — it wasn’t movie magic.   When the film debuted at the Cannes Film Festival, Roger Ebert said it was “the worst film in the history of Cannes.”  Gallo didn’t take his comment lightly, and began a very funny war of the words with the greatest wordsmith that ever lived.  Gallo called Ebert “a fat pig with the physique of a slave trader.”  Ebert then retorted with a play on Winston Churchill’s famous quote, saying, “It is true that I am fat, but one day I shall be thin, and he will still be the director of The Brown Bunny.”  Gallo, who still hadn’t learned his lesson, said he put a hex on Roger Ebert’s colon.  Ebert was unphased, saying, “a colonoscopy is more entertaining to watch than The Brown Bunny.”  The irony of this feud is that Gallo later re-edited the entire film, and Ebert ultimately gave it a thumbs up, claiming that he rescued it.  There’s still a lesson to be learned here, though — don’t mess with Roger Ebert.

Kate Nash — Music Recommendation

I’m always searching for new, non-mainstream music — and it’s no easy task.  While listening to Florence + The Machine on Pandora, I discovered the very gifted Kate Nash.  Nash’s lyrics are so literal, I find myself amazed that she gets away with it in such an effortless way.  Alright — I just vomited at my music review.  Clearly I wasn’t born to write for Rolling Stone.  How about this — she’s fucking brilliant (and yes mother, sometimes I curse).  Nash was born in Ireland and grew up in London.  Her incredible album, Made of Bricks, was number one in the UK and went platinum.  I’ve posted two songs below.  Foundations was a huge hit, and if you’ve ever been in a failed relationship, I would encourage you to listen to it.  It’s a post-breakup-anthem.  The second song I posted, Merry Happy, didn’t chart well, though I think it’s one of the strongest songs on the album.  Enjoy!

What is Defamation & Why Didn’t Ashton Kutcher Sue?

At the time Star Magazine published their story about how Ashton Kutcher cheated on Demi Moore, Kutcher tweeted that Star Magazine defamed his character and he threatened to sue. This isn’t the first time celebrities have sued or threatened to sue tabloids for defamation of character. So what is defamation, and why doesn’t every celebrity sue?

The first thing to understand about defamation is that celebrities can’t sue anyone who airs their dirty laundry if it’s true. When celebrities and other public figures sue for defamation, they can only win if they prove that the defamatory statement is false.

Oh what’s that you say? What is a defamatory statement? Great question. It is a statement about the celebrity which hurts his reputation. The statement must also be communicated to a person other than the celebrity himself. (So if Star Magazine called Ashton at his house and accused him of cheating, they’d be in the clear — because no one else heard it).

Given the above explanation, it doesn’t seem like it should be so hard for Ashton to prove his case against Star Magazine, right? They published the story — “Ashton Kutcher Caught Cheating…” — to the world and it makes Ashton sound like an unfaithful jerk. And of course it’s false – that Jamie Madrox look-alike would never cheat on G.I. Jane, right?

But there’s one more catch — as a public figure, Ashton must prove that Star Magazine published the statement with full knowledge that the statement was false or with reckless disregard for whether it was true or false. Sure, they probably knew they were lying and they probably do it all the time. But how is Ashton going to prove it in court?

It is hard for him to come up with photos of him NOT kissing girls. He would have to get someone from Star to blow up their own journalistic spot and say, “yeah, I knew it wasn’t true and I wrote it anyway.”

If you’ve been following my analysis, you might have come to one of two conclusions to the title of this post. Either the case is just too hard to win, or Ashton really did cheat and can’t sue a tabloid for reporting the truth.  So which one is it?  I have no idea, but you’re free to draw your own conclusions.

In closing, I’d like to proclaim that everything I didn’t already know, I learned from The Dishmaster.

Julianne Hough’s Video Banned from CMT — She’s a Stripper Now

Alright, I have to confess.  I’ve never really loved Julianne Hough, and I can’t quite put my finger on the reason.  Is it because she’s cuter than me and I’m jealous?  Perhaps.  Or perhaps it’s because she comes off as extremely arrogant.  Anyways, she just released a video for her new song, Is That So Wrong, and CMT banned it for being too sexy.  I watched the entire video and my problem with it isn’t the sexiness, it’s the ridiculousness.  Allow me to explain.  Like most videos, Hough starts off wearing a cute dress with her hair blowing in an off-camera fan.  After about a minute or so later, things take a turn for the worse.  She’s standing around her apartment yearning for something, and then breaks out in ridiculous dance moves that have no place in the video.  At one point, she even does a somersault on the bed.  Gosh, when I’m at home pining, you know what I do?  I run right over to my bed and do a somersault.  Did I mention that I also wear cut-off shorts and stick my ass out toward a camera?  Man, that Julianne Hough sure is relatable.  To watch the video, click the link below.

JULIANNE HOUGH VIDEO

Sara Corrales is Naked — Best Body Ever

Alright — I confess. I often read Egotastic because I enjoy looking for celebrity cellulite. Unfortunately (or fortunately), they only post the perfect chicks. Because I’m so mentally healthy, I can appreciate a beautiful body just as much as the next chick. I don’t condone paparazzi photos, but since this picture was taken on a magazine shoot, I feel it’s okay to link to. To see the body in question, click the link below. Further Reading: Rachel McAdams’ Ass Defies Gravity — It’s Morning Glorious

 

Sara Corrales — Naked

Barbara Walters Hates Whoopi Goldberg’s Valley Girl Accent

I like Whoopi Goldberg, but her valley girl impersonation has to go, and I think Barbara Walters agrees. The audience never really laughs, and the rest of the ladies always look uncomfortable. I’m surprised Walters hasn’t put a stop to it, but today’s show exposed a semblance of Walters’ internal monologue, when she jokingly screamed at Whoopi, “you are annoying!” Watch the show below, and go to minute 13 to see the exchange begin.

Tim Gunn on Kim Kardashian’s Looks: “As Soon as She Moves, It’s All Over”

You have to admire the chutzpah of Tim Gunn.  The man has no fear, and the vintage interview below is no exception.  Joy Behar asked him what he thought of the Kardashian “look,” and he said that their style is “vulgar, cheap, and tawdry.”  When Behar said they are “sweet girls,” and they have appeared on her show, Gunn asked how they were dressed.  Behar said Kim looked pretty and Tim said, “she’s pretty but she’s a poser.  As soon as she moves it’s all over.”  I’m not sure what he means exactly, but it sounds pretty funny.  Does he mean that her ass is so large, he becomes distracted when she begins to walk?  I’m not sure, but I love Tim Gunn more and more every day.