Artie Lange fans will rejoice to hear that he’s recovered from his recent suicide attempt. Lange performed stand-up at The Comedy Center this weekend, alongside Craig Gass. Gass mentioned that Lange looked great while on Howard Stern today, and Stern suspiciously avoided the subject. I’m guessing that Stern still does not know how to tactfully discuss Lange, and he therefore avoids the subject as much as possible. Judging from the pictures of Lange, it looks like he got his act together. There is a rumor that he will appear on Stern prior to Stern’s contract with Sirius ending, but who knows if he would ever return to the show on a permanent basis. It’s probably best that he doesn’t.
Tag: Howard Stern
Did You Know: Will Arnett is the Voice in the GMC Commercials
When I learned that Will Arnett was the voice in those GMC commercials, I was shocked, mostly because I envision him as that fun, goofy guy from Arrested Development. Who knew he had such a serious voice? I learned this information during Arnett’s appearance on Howard Stern to promote his new pilot with Keri Russell, Running Wilde. The creator, Mitch Hurwitz, also created Arrested Development. Though I have my fingers crossed for Arnett’s new show, at least he has the ongoing voice-over work, which is the most coveted “get” in Hollywood. The commercials take very little man-hours to record, and Arnett gets paid every time it airs. Watch the commercial below, and wait until the end to hear Arnett’s hot-and sexy voice.
Today’s Question: Is Chrissie Hynde the Best Female Vocalist in History?
Mark McGrath appeared on Howard Stern yesterday to promote his new show, Don’t Forget the Lyrics!, and Stern asked him to name his favorite female Rock vocalist. McGrath picked Chrissie Hynde of The Pretenders. The first person that came to my mind when Stern asked the question, was Nancy Wilson of Heart, but Hynde is certainly a good choice. She is currently the only remaining member of The Pretenders, which makes the group more of a tribute band than anything else. That being said, I’d still like to see Hynde perform live. The song below, Brass in Pocket, was their first major hit from their debut album, Pretenders, reaching number one in the UK. So who’s your choice for best female rock vocalist?
Best Arnold Schwarzenegger Quotes
Arnold Schwarzenegger is a very funny man, which is a fact that many people don’t know. Dax Shepard actually inspired this post, when he revealed to Howard Stern that Tom Arnold invited him to hang out with Schwarzenegger. When Schwarzenegger told Shepard how much he loved his movies, Shepard was flattered. That is, until Tom Arnold later confessed that after Shepard left the table, Schwarzenegger said, “who the hell is that?” Leave it to Schwarzenegger to inflate the ego of a man he’s never heard of. And now for the hilarious quote list. Picture his accent while you read — it definitely adds to the entertainment value.
Arnold’s tweet on Sarah Palin (while flying over Alaska)
“[I am] looking everywhere but can’t see Russia.”
Arnold on pumping iron (said during his film, Pumping Iron)
It’s as satisfying to me as, uh, cumming is, you know? As, ah, having sex with a woman and cumming. And so can you believe how much I am in heaven? I am like, uh, getting the feeling of cumming in a gym, I’m getting the feeling of cumming at home, I’m getting the feeling of cumming backstage when I pump up, when I pose in front of 5,000 people, I get the same feeling, so I am coming day and night. I mean, it’s terrific.
On Pot
“Marijuana is not a drug, it’s a leaf”
On his decision to run for Governor
“It was the most difficult decision in my life – except the one in 1978 when I decided to get a bikini wax.”
After being pelted with an egg at a political rally
“This guy owes me bacon now . . . you can’t have egg without bacon.”
On his money
“Money doesn’t make you happy. I now have $50 million but I was just as happy when I had $48 million.”
On his height
“I’m 6’2″. I’ve heard rumors that I’m really much shorter in real life – like 5’6″ or something like that – which is ridiculous. I can assure you this is not the case. People look up to me, and not just because I do a lot of work in the community. I mean, most people really look up to me.”
On running for Governor
“There’s a lot of people who want me to get out of acting and want me to run for governor. I think it’s mostly movie critics.”
Dear Sirius — You’re Doomed Without Howard Stern
Many people don’t remember how they first heard about satellite radio, but I’ll remind them — it’s because of Howard Stern. Before Stern publicly announced that he was moving his terrestrial radio show to Sirius, satellite radio was an urban legend. So with the news that Joe Namath will host a radio show on Sirius, I couldn’t help but wonder whether the folks over at Sirius have any idea about what goes in to a decent radio show. You can’t just pull any famous name off the street, give them a radio show, and hope for the best. You have to find someone seasoned — someone who spent years polishing their craft — someone like Howard Stern. But with every entertainment medium suffering, I suppose I cannot expect radio to understand how to seek out new talent. Even the record industry is incapable of doing this. I get the feeling that Sirius no longer thinks Howard Stern is worth the $100 million per year they originally paid him, and Stern feels disrespected by their current offer. Plus, Sirius keeps putting big names on their stations, in hopes that it will generate the same devoted base that Stern created, but to no avail. Have you not learned your lesson yet guys? After all, they paid Oprah $60 million dollars, and the woman never even appears on her own station — they just play repeats of her television show. Did I mention that she hasn’t once even uttered the name “Sirius” on her own television show? Good job guys for not working that into her contract. But I’m digressing. Here’s my point — pay the guy the $100 million — otherwise, start making those bankruptcy phone calls now. Further Reading: Will Howard Stern Leave Sirius for an Adam Curry Podcast?
Best Television Shows — Do the Actors Keep in Touch?
I’m always wondering whether the actors from my favorite television shows still remain in touch. I’ve done my research, and compiled a list below. Enjoy!
MARRIED WITH CHILDREN
David Faustino revealed on Chelsea Lately that his Married With Children co-stars would be appearing in his new web series, Star-ving, because they really believed in the quality of the series. Though I’m sure his webisodes were good, something tells me that the continued friendship with his co-stars helped land their appearance. The revelation that they still keep in touch, made me yearn for the big-haired Peg Bundy. Married With Children might have been the first ‘Modern Family.’
ROSEANNE
John Goodman is a notorious curmudgeon in interviews. Not even James Lipton could break his guarded nature during Inside the Actors Studio. When asked on The View whether he keeps in touch with his Roseanne co-stars, he bluntly said no, and blamed it on himself. Judging from the picture above, they at least keep in touch at awards shows.
WINGS
Wings was one of my favorite shows in television history. The two brothers are still on my hot-man list, and I luckily get my Tim Daly fix on Private Practice. I couldn’t help but wonder whether Tim Daly and Steven Weber keep in touch. The picture above was very recently taken, so I’m happy to report that they are still friends.
FULL HOUSE
Every time John Stamos appears on Howard Stern’s radio show, Stern tells him to have sex with the Olsen twins. Stamos says he just couldn’t do it, but a small part of me thinks he might. The entire cast of Full House say they keep in touch, though I suspiciously have never seen a picture of the Olsen twins with any of them. But six out of eight isn’t bad.
BEVERLY HILLS 90210
Ian Ziering said in a recent interview, that he wanted to do a 90210 reunion, but The CW couldn’t make it happen. Apparently, the entire cast was willing to appear. In fact, at Jason Priestly’s wedding, many 90210 cast members showed up, including, Jennie Garth, Ian Ziering, Tiffani Thiessen and Tori Spelling.
SEINFELD
There isn’t much need to answer whether the Seinfeld cast still talks, because they all appeared on a Curb Your Enthusiasm reunion show.
SAVED BY THE BELL
Jimmy Fallon tried and failed to get the Saved By The Bell cast to reunite on his show. He was forced to have a California Dreams reunion instead. They later reunited for People Magazine, with the exception of Dustin Diamond, who wasn’t invited due to a ridiculous “tell-all” book about his fellow cast-mates.
Will Howard Stern Leave Sirius for an Adam Curry Podcast?
Howard Stern recently interviewed Adam Curry, a multi-millionaire also known as the “pod-father of radio.” Stern asked him if it was possible to make money off of podcasting, and Curry offered him $100 million dollars on the spot to work for him. I blew it off at the time, but I now think that Curry is among Stern’s “other offers” that he mentions during his on-air, angry negotiations with Sirius. Today, he said that he will “find a way” to bring new technology to people’s cars, and if he has to leave Sirius he is sure his fans will follow him, regardless of the technology. I think he was cryptically referring to Curry’s offer. Here’s my advice for Stern — either return to terrestrial, stay with Sirius, or leave radio altogether. When Stern left terrestrial radio, he severely cut his listening audience, because many of his loyal fans did not switch over to satellite radio. If he again changed technology, he would cut his audience even further, and his voice would essentially become obsolete. Sometimes it’s not about the money, it’s about your legacy, your brand, and sheer numbers. $100 million dollars sure is a lot of money, but is it worth it? Further reading: Was Howard Stern’s Vacation Really a Contract Negotiation?
Jerry Seinfeld’s Famous Girlfriends on ‘Seinfeld’
Jerry Seinfeld’s recent appearance on Howard Stern had me nostalgic for the great days of television. I started to think of his show, and I remembered the very funny episode with Teri Hatcher. It then occurred to me just how many famous women guest-starred as one of Jerry’s girlfriends. I’ve compiled a list for your enjoyment.
Teri Hatcher had the most memorable guest appearance on Seinfeld. The subject of her episode was whether her boobs were real or fake, and she closed her scene with the very famous line, “They’re real and they’re spectacular.” When recently asked about her guest-spot, Hatcher said, “now they’re just real.”
Kristin Davis appeared on Seinfeld as Jerry’s girlfriend Jenna. Jerry accidentally knocks her toothbrush in the toilet, and she uses it before he can tell her. When she finally finds out, she sticks something of Jerry’s in the toilet as retaliation, and refuses to tell him what it was.
Marcia Cross appeared on an episode called The Slicer. She played a dermatologist, which Jerry doesn’t consider a real medical field, as it doesn’t involve saving lives. He later realizes that, because Cross’s character screens people for skin cancer, she does in fact save lives. He then apologizes.
Christine Taylor will always have a special place in my heart as Melody Hanson from Hey Dude. After Hey Dude, she played Jerry’s “too perfect” girlfriend, Ellen, who ultimately got dumped because Jerry’s parents liked her, which meant there was obviously something wrong with her.
I first noticed Amanda Peet on an underrated, short-lived show called Jack & Jill. Before that, she had numerous television guest-spots, which included a coveted appearance on Seinfeld. She played Lanette, Jerry’s high maintenance girlfriend that requires both Jerry and George to team up to create the perfect man who could handle her.
Courtney Cox pretends to be Jerry Seinfeld’s wife so that she can share in his 25% discount at the dry cleaners. He eventually cheats on her, and gives another woman the discount. Men are such pigs, aren’t they?
Debra Messing appeared on one of the best Seinfeld episodes in history, entitled The Yada Yada. Enough said.
Jennifer Coolidge will forever be known as Stifler’s mom from American Pie, but her first credited acting gig was on Seinfeld, where she played a masseuse that Jerry eventually dumps because she refuses to give him a massage (but had no problem massaging Kramer).
Howard Stern Tells Jerry Seinfeld He’ll Stay on the Radio
The only interesting thing about Jerry Seinfeld’s surprise call to Howard Stern’s radio show today, was Stern’s confession to Seinfeld that he’ll stay on the radio. Though he did not say he’ll re-sign with Sirius, he admitted that he won’t retire, and he is fielding “other offers.” The Stern/Seinfeld interview, was their first on-air exchange in over a decade because, as Seinfeld said, “you only go on Howard Stern when you’re on your way up, and when you’re on your way down.” Unfortunately, Stern didn’t ask Jerry about their “feud,” which Stern thinks started when he made fun of Jerry’s May-December romance with Shoshanna Lonstein (who was a teenager at the time). Jerry didn’t seem very in the mood to play though, so any mention of a past scuffle between them might have led to another decade of silent treatment.
Should Howard Stern Play Artie Lange Clips — Is it Moral?
Something makes me very uneasy about Howard Stern’s replay week while he’s on vacation. He is playing the best of Artie Lange, which includes many of Artie’s tortured revelations on the radio. For those of you that don’t know, comedian Artie Lange attempted suicide recently, in a very gruesome and disturbing way. He consistently discussed his drug addiction and depression on the air, which led me to question Stern’s morals for keeping him employed. To be fair, Stern openly doubted his decision to keep Artie employed, but often said he didn’t think that firing him would help his recovery. My problem is that Artie frequently showed up for his radio gig while on heroin, and often fell asleep on the air, which led to grandiose guffaw’s at Lange’s expense. In hindsight, I’m sure Stern is tortured by his choices. Is it okay to laugh at the depressed, drug-addicted, alcoholic? And is it okay to keep paying the guy that is using his gigantic paycheck to facilitate his addiction? Because neither Stern nor I have objective answers to these questions, I think it’s probably best to forgo the Artie Lange archive altogether.