Of all the names thrown around to replace Charlie Sheen, Ashton Kutcher is by far the best. Though I’m unsure anyone can rescue a show that lost it’s star, Kutcher is certainly worth betting on. First, he’s a social media superstar, which will help people get excited about the transition. And second, he’s a television titan. In recent years, Kutcher has made a valiant attempt at a movie career, which has fallen flat. Some actors just aren’t meant for the movie business, and Kutcher is one of them. He’s a Television star who hit it big on ‘That 70’s Show,’ and something tells me he’ll hit it big again on this one. Plus, he’s getting paid bank, which makes his decision a win-win regardless of the outcome.
Category: Television
Sarah Michelle Gellar Hates Buffy Reboot Idea — Wasn’t Her Show a Rip-Off Too?
Sarah Michelle Gellar has trashed the idea of remaking the film, ‘Buffy the Vampire Slayer’, saying, “I think it’s a horrible idea. To try to do a ‘Buffy’ without Joss Whedon, I mean that’s, like, honestly, to be incredibly non-eloquent: that’s the dumbest idea I’ve ever heard. It was a movie. It’s been made. It stars Kristy Swanson. They made it. They don’t need to make another one!” Um . . . am I missing something? If Sarah Michelle Gellar’s objection is that the remake idea is unoriginal, one could say the exact same thing about the television show that made her famous, since it was based on the original film. Furthermore, the original film was terrible, so I’m not sure why there’s such an objection to executing a famous concept with a better writer.
Seth Meyers Kills it at White House Dinner — Trump Didn’t Laugh
Now might be a good time to confess my gigantic crush on Seth Meyers, the head writer for Saturday Night Live. And after watching his performance at the White House Correspondents’ Dinner, my crush has officially become an obsession. My favorite part of the evening was when Meyers took aim at Donald Trump, who deserved it. Instead of taking it in stride, Trump looked noticeably pissed, and didn’t smile once. He later called Seth Meyers a “stutterer” and said he was “inappropriate.” First, how dare Donald Trump say anything negative about my future husband. And second, can’t the guy take a joke? Trump reminds me of a schoolyard bully who picks on everyone until some tiny kid stomps on his toe, and then he marches off crying to his mommy. If you can’t take it Mr. Trump, then don’t dish it out. Watch the very yummy Seth Meyers in action below.
Audrina Patridge’s New Show — A Poor Man’s Version of ‘The Hills’
Judging from the clip below, Audrina’s new show looks like another peak into the boring lives of depth-less television stars. My patience for reality television is seriously waning (with the exception of Jersey Shore, of course). In the video below, Audrina’s mother apologizes for her drunken rant on Dancing With the Stars, and Audrina completely blows it off and says she doesn’t care what other people think. I’m no expert on alcohol so I might be wrong on this, but her mother looks drunk in the clip, which is ironic because she’s apologizing for her drunken behavior. Am I to seriously believe that Audrina is completely fine with her mother’s actions, and they’re one big happy family? All signs point to no, and unless they plan on taping some kind of intervention for what appears to be alcoholism, I don’t believe a second of that video. Again, I have absolutely no idea if her mother has a drinking problem, but I’m almost certain that this is faux reality hogwash.
Amber Riley Sings Adele’s Someone Like You on her Webcam — Bad Move?
I’ve said this many times on The Dishmaster before, but once you’re on a hit show like Glee, you have to not only create a celebrity mystique, but you must also watch your brand, to ensure that your personal life doesn’t conflict with your character. That brings me to Amber Riley, who covered Adele’s Someone Like You on her webcam. Though I think she has a great voice, I’m fundamentally against this on principle. You’re on an expensive network television show, and your broadcasting a song on your personal webcam inside your apartment. It looks unprofessional and cheap — and you have an image to maintain.
Demi Moore & Ashton Kutcher Discuss Their Love on Piers Morgan — They Annoy Me
Call me a curmudgeon, but I find it extremely irritating when celebrity couples discuss how happy they are. Despite being a love-hater, I’m also superstitious, which means I wouldn’t dare publicly declare my love for someone on national television (or on facebook for that matter) for fear that the relationship will end, and those statements will be etched in time forever. That doesn’t stop Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher though, who have been on a love parade since they got married. Watch a clip of their appearance on Piers Morgan below. Try not to get a cavity from the sugar.
Sarah Lake on 20/20 — Still Won’t Keep Quiet About Black Swan
Oh Sarah Lake . . . you still don’t get it. I’ll explain it to you again so that you understand why your behavior is inappropriate. It’s absolutely none of your business if the movie studio wants to portray Natalie Portman as a ballerina. You were hired to be her dance-double, and you did your job. Now be done with it. To go on national television and expose who really did all the dancing is ridiculous and unprofessional. In the interview below, Lake explains that she’s discussing the issue because she wants to “stand up for the art form,” so people don’t think they can become a professional ballet dancer in a year and a half. Here’s the problem — no one thinks that. And what if they do think that? What’s the harm? If I think I can become a professional ballet dancer in a year, then maybe I’ll take up the sport and get in shape while trying. Maybe more people will become interested in ballet, which only helps the art form. But if I’m convinced that it takes me 20 years, then why bother? Get my point Ms. Lake? Learn the business of Hollywood before you run your mouth.
R.I.P. All My Children — I’ll Remember You Always
Though I’m not a soap opera fan, I have a special place in my heart for All My Children, because my mother watched it religiously while I was growing up. She’d tape it on VHS (remember those?) and sometimes sit for hours in front of the television to catch up on the episodes she missed. At one point, I became addicted too, and it was right around the time Tad returned from his death and went to find Dixie. It took weeks for them to finally reconnect, and I was dying for Dixie to find out that the love her life never really died after all. Can you believe Tad had amnesia and couldn’t remember her? I’ll never forget the great moments with Erika Kane, played by the unforgettable Susan Lucci. I also vividly remember a much curvier Kelly Ripa, who fell in love with her husband, Mark Consuelos on the show. I loved that show — and I’m sad to see it go. But television has changed, and soap operas were targeted to stay-at-home mothers. With the change in both tradition and the economy, those moms aren’t at home anymore — so the ratings suffered. Goodbye All My Children. I’ll love you forever.
Sidney Lumet Passed Away — I Weep for Cinema
One of our greatest directors has died, and when looking at his resume, it certainly doesn’t shock me that he gave us five of our greatest films in history, including: 12 Angry Men; Dog Day Afternoon; Serpico; The Verdict; and Network. Television is a writer’s medium and film is a director’s medium. So the next time you find yourself loving a movie, take the time to look up the director of that film, and then Netflix every film that director has ever done. Actors often miss this point when selecting roles, and their career suffers as a result. Sidney Lumet was brilliant — and consistent. In honor of his passing, and his gift to cinema, I’ve post a clip from 12 Angry Men below. They just don’t make them like he did anymore, and it makes me “mad as hell.” Goodbye Sidney.
MTV Gets Greedy — Picks Up Two ‘Jersey Shore’ Spin-Offs
For those of you who love Jersey Shore, today signifies the beginning of the end of the world’s greatest reality show in the history of television. Whenever television executives hit the jackpot, they milk it to the point of exhaustion. Such is the case with Jersey Shore, as MTV has officially picked up two spin-offs of the popular show, one following Snooki and JWoww’s post-shore antics, and the other following Pauly D on the road as a DJ. While I’m certain those spin-offs will have traction, I’m also certain it will devalue the original series, and will inevitably hurt its ratings. When you have a treasure on your hands, you don’t break it down and sell it’s parts — you protect it. How about MTV come up with another original idea, instead of recycling an existing one?