It's Not Gossip, It's Commentary
Jennifer Grey got a visit from a very famous guy on tonight’s Dancing With the Stars — her father. Joel Grey is most known as the original Master of Ceremonies in Cabaret. Grey has won an Oscar, a Tony, and a Golden Globe for Cabaret, and he’s considered a Broadway legend. Watch his appearance below, and click the link to see him perform a scene from Caberet.
I don’t know a lot of stuff. But what I do know is that we will never agree on abortion. I realize that pro-lifers think they can change minds by showing people pictures of fetuses, but I don’t think that works any better than members of PETA showing people videos of chickens being tortured. You’re either pro-life or pro-choice, and that is that. I often wonder if they bring up the topic just to test Elizabeth Hasselbeck’s ability to keep her head from exploding. I’m sick of hearing the topic debated. Has anyone ever witnessed someone discuss the topic and change their mind in the middle? I’ve posted an old clip below — but trust me — it’s one of about five thousand discussions on The View about the issue.
Every time I get frustrated with Howard Stern’s radio show I imagine myself having a personal conversation with Stern and telling him everything he needs to improve. But I don’t have to — because Chris Rock does my dirty work. Rock Called Stern’s show today and told Stern that his show “needs some improvements.” Stern was quiet, presumably because he doesn’t take criticism well. Rock wasn’t intimidated and said that if he’s going to take Friday’s off he should still have an original show on the air. He also told him that the “unannounced Mondays have to fucking stop.” Rock is referring to Stern’s incessant vacations, which Stern never announces. It’s infuritating because you get into the car to go to work on a Monday morning, turn on your radio in anticipation of a new Howard Stern show, and you get dated, repeated crap instead. When Stern said he would stay on the air if he could work less hours, Rock said, “you barely work now.” Stern told Rock that Oprah does less hours than him and gets away with it, and Rock said that it’s a ridiculous comparison. Way to go, Chris!
Kim Kardashian is launching a credit card for teens, which gives them a small amount of credit so they learn to spend responsibly. This might be the best celebrity business decision in history. If there’s anything I know about my useless teenage education, it’s that those worthless teachers left the most important lesson out of their lectures — DON’T FUCK UP YOUR CREDIT! My adult life has never involved a fraction, but it’s certainly involved buying a car. I’m officially going to stop picking on Kim Kardashian. Not only because she launched a credit card instead of a dumb fragrance, but also because I’ve recently been tipped off by a reliable source that she’s a very kind person. So there you have it. Congratulations, Kim.
This movie was a breath of fresh air, which is a strange statement because Robert Downey, Jr. spent most of the film feeling suffocated by Zach Galifianakis’. It was light-hearted and funny with just the right amount of gross-out humor. Galifianakis and Downey drive across the country together after they end up on a no-fly list. Under no other circumstances would these two men hang out, which is why the film is so great. Downey is a tightly wound guy who is a bit of prick, and Galifianakis is a sweetheart who likes everyone but is liked by no one. I don’t think this movie could have survived without these two actors, and it’s worth seeing just for their performance. Plus, have I mentioned I’m in love with Robert Downey?
No movie should be made based on true events if those events took place less than fifteen years ago. Having said that, I think you can guess how I felt about Fair Game. The film is based on the CIA leak of Valerie Plame, and I can’t say I know any more information about the story after watching the film than I did before I watched it. Now for my next movie rule — Don’t show clips of real-life people during a movie. If Naomi Watts is playing Valerie Plame, then there should be another actor playing George Bush. But playing clips of Bush in a movie makes me think I should just stay home and watch C-Span instead. The entire movie felt like a boring documentary. Sure Sean Penn is great, but his acting chops alone don’t warrant the insane movie ticket price I paid.
Keith Olbermann was suspended for making political donations to the democratic party, and many consider it laughable that anyone doubted Olbermann’s democratic standing. I have mixed feelings about this. First, it would be nice to assume that talking heads form their opinions on an issue-by-issue basis, instead of blindly supporting their party. But as Jon Stewart pointed out in his infamous Crossfire interview, that assumption is incorrect. The truth is that talking heads support their party, and they will champion any issue based on their party line. Apparently, MSNBC would like to present Mr. Olbermann as non-partisan, as a way to uphold their brand. I obviously think Olbermann does a better job of hiding any bias than someone like Bill O’Reilly or the certifiable Glenn Beck. But with or without the donation — it’s clear where he stands. That being said, there were still people out there that doubted Clay Aiken’s sexual orientation up until the day he came out of the closet. Translation? — Without Olbermann’s donation, perhaps some people still thought he was “straight” — or Republican. Forgive me — I’m terrible with analogies.
When I wrote “gives it to” Hoda and Kathy Lee, please note that I’m talking about Joel’s interview on The Today Show, and not a disturbing threesome. While promoting his show, Community, Kathy Lee and Hoda confronted Joel about why he relentlessly pokes fun at them on The Soup. Joel’s response? — “Have you seen your show?” He also took a jab at the girls for not discussing Community, which he was actually there to promote. Watch below.
I have a lot to say about the much publicized Private Practice rape episode, so get comfortable. I have been watching television for most of my life, because it’s an escape. It’s meant for entertainment. It’s meant to take me out of my own world and put me in another. I understand that there are many ways to entertain a fantasy world, but I don’t think any of those ways should include acting out rape on television. It’s unnecessary, and it’s a very easy way to go. KaDee Strickland promoted the episode on The View, where she said that she was honored to play the part, and that she spoke with many rape victims so that she could accurately portray the scene without offending anyone. I don’t disagree that it was accurate, respectful, and risky. But that’s not the point. The point is that Shonda Rimes (the creator) makes very easy choices to produce the emotions she hopes to produce. That includes giving characters cancer, killing off a man with a young daughter, and finally — getting someone raped. You might think it was brave to write this episode — but I don’t — I think it was easy. There’s a very loathed writing practice that they tell you about in film school, and it’s called “kick-the-dog.” In a nutshell, it means that writers often execute the very cheap tactic of letting the audience know that a character is bad, by having that character kick a dog. It’s easy and looked down upon because there are many other more creative ways to inform the audience about a character, and having him kick a dog is an easy way out. I consider Shonda’s writing to fall within the kick-the-dog umbrella. Think of another way to create emotion, and another way to create drama.
Oh, LeAnn. I can’t figure out why she annoys me enough to warrant a post, but she does. In a recent interview, which was presumably meant to clean up her soiled image, she discussed her affair with Eddie Cibrian, and her responses indicate that she still hasn’t learned her PR lesson. Perhaps someone should use diagrams and cartoons to get through to her. She continues to insist that she doesn’t regret the affair, because she’s “in love,” and affairs happen “everyday to so many people.” The problem isn’t that you had an affair with a married father of two young children (though it certainly doesn’t help). The problem is that you publicize that affair on your twitter account, and constantly post pictures of your relationship, which I have every reason to believe is a desperate ploy to rub your affair in the face of Cibrian’s ex-wife. It’s not the affair that’s the problem, it’s how you handle it.
UPDATE: LeAnn has used her infamous twitter account to deny that she cried during her interview with Robin Roberts. That’s a great idea — it certainly makes you look better to deny that you had any semblance of emotion about the end of two marriages.